New Zealand Hare Krishna Spiritual Resource Network Newsletter 2 Archive:

New Zealand Hare Krishna Spiritual Resource Network Newsletter
      - Number #002  (Oct 1999)
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-------------------------------<    ISKCON ki jaya   >----------

_0/\, ( PAMRO to you all)

_0____,   All glories to Srila Prabhupad.

I'd like to Officially welcome everyone who is receiving this
either directly from me or second or third hand from friends to
our Network. Many of you will have had a chance to view our
WWW-site by now - and the feedback has been appreciated. As we
expand the facility of resource more pages will appear, and with
the intent of assisting you all in the smooth execution of your
individual prescribed duties/services/functions. I trust that all
is well with everyone by the Mercy of the Lord. However, if anyone
would like to be removed from this mailout please just send me a
message requesting me to do so, and I will do promptly. If you would
like to be added directly to the mailout please also let me know and
I will do the needful. Hare Krishna. =>B-) JTCd
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|)<>(|)<>(      The Nectar in this Issue:      )<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<
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IN THIS ISSUE:

WWW - news and views:
Deals for members:
Missing Links:
Advertisements:
Words of Wisdom - Shastra & Shastrakaras speak:
            (Srila Prabhupad  & the previous Acaryas)
At Grass Roots: Y2K
Prasadam Recipes:
Krishna conscious - Vedikly acceptable jokes:

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)<>(|)<>(    On the WWW News and Views:   )<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)
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The following web-site is coming together slowly, there's a lot of nectar
to be found there already, yet it is not 1/3rd complete. In due course
it will help you all no-doubt.

http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/CalendarWhosWho-page.htm

We are hoping to get something together for Vijay Dasami for the site.
We have collected a wealth of information on the month of Kartik from the
Hari Bhakti Vilas (Vaishnava Tantra and Smrti) and will be definately
placing a page for the commencement thereof. Other festivals such as
Dipavali, Govadhan Puja and Srila Prabhupada's Tirubhav should be
there by the time they come around. Praying for favourable breezes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y2K - Are You Preparing Yourself and Family???:

See our page for information on Y2K and how it may effect you and your
service to the Lord. Without going over the top, a little preparation
could make your/our services run smoothly.

http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/Y2K-information-page.htm

Without any hype, I humbly suggest that it is essential to make some kind
of contingency. None of us know what will actually happen, or how what
does will affect us, or our services/functions. Certainly Krishna protects
His devotees, and has given us shelter and intelligence, therefore to
neglect what has been given could be taken as symbolic to false renounciation.
What the Lord has given He has entrusted us to use wisely. Sri Ishopanishad
encourages us to understand who is the actual owner, and our position as
entrusted keepers of the Lord's property. With such a consciousness to make
moderate plans for continuence of our services is not harmful to spiritual
development. Rather thinking in such a manner helps devotees to come together
share resources, and meditate on our reliance upon the Supreme Lord.

Non-devotees think that they either can, or cannot avoid the effects of
various things such as Y2K, and actually it is true. But for devotees the
meditation is not upon what we can or cannot do, but instead upon the
continued, uninterupted service of the Lord. When we say this it doesn't
just mean in a temple, preaching centre or farm project somewhere. What we
are talking of is the maintanence of our sadhana. That sadhana is the link
between the sadhaka and the Lord through the agency of the mercy of the
Guru.

In many places Srila Prabhupad has stated that he has established Krishna
Conciousness. Prabhupad wrote to Damodar dasa, "I am so glad to know that
things are progressing nicely with your center. That should be our constant
care - to maintain what we have already established and continue to improve
the standard as far as possible in the loving service of Lord Krsna....You
are a very intelligent devotee of Lord Krsna and if you turn over your
intelligence to Him, He will bestow upon you more and more intelligence how
to serve the Spiritual Master and Krsna in full Krsna Consciousness. That
is the perfection of your life. So please use your good intelligence for
serving Krsna only and do not be misled to divert your attention elsewhere."
(letter to Damodar dasa. 28th September 1970. Calcutta, India.)

"Prabhupäda: Dependency, that is... We are practiced. Suppose you have given
this motorcar, but it doesn’t mean that if there is no motorcar my Krsna
consciousness will be checked. If there is little facility, we can take it.
That is another thing. But it is not that because there is no motorcar, then
there is no Krsna consciousness. It is not like that. Ahaituky apratihatä.
Krsna consciousness cannot be checked by any impediment. That cannot be
checked. So we are not dependent. But to make the best use of a bad bargain.
If we get some facility, why we should not take? We are not so fool. If I
get a motorcar to go somewhere, why shall I walk? That is another foolishness.
But we are not dependent on the motor... “Because there is no motorcar,
therefore my Krsna consciousness stopped.” We are not such fools. The
motorcar is available; all right, take advantage of it. We don’t decline
to accept whatever little material facilities are there. That is not
foolish... That is foolishness. We can take advantage. But our main business
is how to make advance in Krsna consciousness. Not that we are suffering
in this material world, and because we have got this motorcar, therefore
our suffering is now ended. We are not so fool. We can take advantage of
the motorcar, but we don’t take that this is the solution. We are not so
fool. But these rascals, they are taking, “This is the solution.” That is
not possible. That is called duräshaya. Duräshayä ye bahir-artha-mäninah.
They are thinking that “Material adjustment, we shall be happy.” That is
duräshaya. It will never be fulfilled. Na te viduh svärtha-gatim hi vishnum.
They do not know. Unless we go back home, back to Godhead, there is no
solution. This is not solution. This is duräshaya. Everything is described.
Duräshaya means the hope which will never be successful. So these rascals,
they are trying to be happy by so-called scientific advancement. That is
duräshaya. That’s not possible, hopeless." (A.C.Bhaktivedanta Swami
Prabhupada. 31st January 1977. Room Conversation. Bhuvaneshwar, India.)

"...our main business is to train up men to be self sufficient and competent
in many ways to carry on the preaching work, not to make them into specialists
or to minimize their responsibility by centralizing everything. If each center
must rely upon its own strength to stand, that will be better training ground
for the devotees. We must learn how to do all kinds of varieties of engagements
on Krsna's service, not that we shall expect anyone else to act for us and thus
avoid something ourselves. But for reasons of spreading Krsna Consciousness
movement, we may sometimes centralize, just like the books and money for BBT
are managed by Karandhara in Los Angles. In that case, for more than one man
to be dealing with Dai Nippon, overseeing the general production and financial
condition of the books, if that were left for each temple to manage, there
would be great difficulty and the books would get neither printed nor paid
for nor distributed widely. So in that case, centralized management is
preferable. But in the case of new temples, it is better if they must have to
struggle a little while to establish themselves in their cities, become
familiar with the local city officials and leading citizens, elicit support
from all quarters of the city, like that, otherwise these things will be
neglected and there will be false dependency upon the outside supplies.
This will deteriorate everything. Our purpose of Krsna consciousness
movement is to create first class servants of Krsna, that means they
know how to do everything." (A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada. 9th
January 1973. letter to Damodara dasa. Bombay, India.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DARSANA DHYANA SAMSPARSAIR MATSYA KURMA VIHANGAMAH
PUSNANTI SVANYAPATYANI TATHA AHAM API PADMAJA
MUHUR TENAPI SAN HARTUM SAKTAU YADYAPI DANAVAN
MAD BHAKTANAM VINODARTHAM KOROMI VIVIDHAH KRIYAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 10/161,162 from PADMA PURANA the Supreme Personality of
Godhead speaks to Lord Brahma)

"Oh Brahma, just as the fish, turtle and birds take care of their of their own
offspring by seeing, meditating and touching, respectively, I also take care
of My devotees in that very way. Even though I can kill all of the demons
within ninety-six minutes (a couple of muhurtas), still, just to please My
devotees, I engage in many kinds of activities in many forms."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The Lord here declares that this material world is full of miseries (asukham)
and at the same time is very flickering (anityam). Therefore one’s only duty
is to engage himself in devotional service. This is the best end to which human
life can be put. Those devotees who are constantly engaged in the service of
the lotus feet of the Lord achieve not only all material benefits but also all
spiritual benefits, for at the end of life they go back home, back to Godhead.
Their destination is described in this verse as bhagavat-padam. The word padam
means “abode,” and bhagavat means “the Supreme Personality of Godhead.” Thus
the destination of the devotees is the abode of the Supreme Personality of Godhead."
(A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada. Srimad Bhagavatam 4:23:27. purport.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y2K BBC Report (for the UK):
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/static/millennium_bug/countries/
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/static/millennium_bug/bugtown/default.stm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/worldservice/millenniumbug/

Y2K Report on individual countries A-Z:
http://www.fco.gov.uk/travel/dynpage.asp?Page=144

Y2K in New Zealand:
http://www.fco.gov.uk/travel/dynpage.asp?Page=159

Check your local council/govt office's preparations:
http://www.localgovtnz.co.nz/
http://www.y2k.govt.nz/nz/govt/index.html

More than anyone needs to know about Y2K from Auckland University:
http://www.y2k.auckland.ac.nz/y2k/y2k.html
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Text 2627854 from COM]
 "70% of Indian banks are Y2K compliant, said RBI in a recent report.
 The rest are computerised."
 (The Times Of India July 5, 1999)

P.S. Believe it or not, this is not a joke; it is an actual quote.

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|)<>(|)<>(    Deals available for members::   )<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<
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       Bhaktapus is no ordinary Octopus
As well as reaching to the eight directions
He also reaches to the zeneth and nadir regions
     ...and to the spiritual realm.
                      _,||-._
                    ,'  ||   `.
            |\     / ,-.||,-. \     /|
            )o),/ ( ( o )( o ) ) \.(o(
           /o/// /|  `-'\/`-' |\ \\\o\
          / / |\ \(   .    ,   )/ /| \ \
          | | \o`-/    `\/'    \-'o/ | |
          \ \  `,'              `.'  / /
       \.  \ `-'  ,'|   /\   |`.  `-' /  ,/
        \`. `.__,' /   /  \   \ `.__,' ,'/
         \o\     ,'  ,'    `.  `.     /o/
          \o`---'  ,'        `.  `---'o/
           `.____,'  bhaktapus `.____,'

Bhakta-pus is now reaching out with his arms to find deals, and
make advantages for devotees who want to use our network. As new
things happen and become available we'll keep y'll informed
about discounts and how to have access to them - what to do.

http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/index-deals4-devs.htm

This is a totally free service, we have worked hard to organise it
please make good use of it for you development of Krishna Seva.

We have just received a shipment of books from HH Bhaktivikash
Swami of some of his books in print at present:

Glimpses of Traditional Indian Life: NZ$22 including postage in NZ

"Journey to the REAL India. Discover the wisdom and devotion at the
heart of Indian life. Meet people brought up in an atmosphere of
Godliness. Find out how it shaped their character and enriched their
lives. Explore also the effects of technological development, the
downfall of hereditary culture, and other causes of India's
present degradation."

Find out about:

Ideal Family Life
Intercaste Harmony
Uncommon Scholarship
Simple Living & High Thinking
Dependence on God and Nature
Woman; Subordinate Yet Respected
   ...and more...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My Memories of Srila Prabhupada: NZ$17 including postage in NZ

HH Bhakti Vikas Swami recalls his few, but precious, memories of
the most significant person to grace the earth in recent times.

And a bonus in the same cover:
On serving Srila Prabhupada in Separation
Speaking Strongly in Srila Prabhupada's Service

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Message to the Youth of India:  NZ$7 including postage in NZ

A Beginner's Guide to Krishna Consciousness: NZ$7 including postage in NZ

For any overseas purchasers please contact me by e-mail.

More books available at:

http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/SP-Books2page.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For all your sanskrit needs; fonts, etc.
http://www.com.org/~mbest/freeware/

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HMHH\.|
\HMHH\|
\\HMHH\      A New "Loft" to open in Palmerston North
HH\HMHH\          We'll let you know the details in due course
HHH\HMHH\
    \HMHH\-HHH\  Bhaktine Ann (of Glen and Ann - Masterton)
     \HMHH\.HHM\   is presently compiling an Ekadasi Cookbook
      \HMHH\.HMH\   if members have any recipies for the book
      |\HMHH\\HMH\   or suggestions please send to her at their
      |H\HHH| \HMH\    e-mail address:  <Ahimsa1088@hotmail.com>
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      \HMH\      \HMH\ http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/Ahimsa
       \HMH\    __|HM|
        \HMH\  /HH\.M|
         \HMH\ |MHH\.|
          \HMH\\HMHH\|     If you have anything that you would
           \HMH\\HMHH\        like to share or request, that can
            \HMHH\HMHH\         be placed in this spot. You know
             \HHHH\HMHH\          where to send it.
                   \HMHH\-HHH\
                    \HMHH\.HHM\      <consumer.power@xtra.co.nz>
                     \HMHH\.HMH\           or alernately
                     |\HMHH|\HMH              <jtcd@xtra.co.nz>
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|  /   \                                                          |
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| `---' |            Please take a moment to have a look          |
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(|)<>(   Words of Wisdom - Shastra & Shastrakaras speak:  )<>(|)<>(
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The following quotes are from Dik-darshini Tika of Sriyuts Gopal Bhattar
Goswami and Sanatan Goswami's, commentary on Hari Bhakti Vilas.
 
SRI PURVO NARASINGHO DVIR JAYAD UTTARAS TU SAHA
TRIH SAPTA KRTVO JAPATAS TU MAHA BHAYA NIVARANAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/273 from KURMA PURANA)

 If somebody chants the name of Sri Nrsimhadeva twenty-one times, by
putting Sri before Nrsimhadeva and chanting Jaya Jaya before repeating
"Jaya Nrsimha, Sri Nrsimha, Jaya Jaya Nrsimhadeva", in other words, if
somebody chants this twenty-one times, he becomes free from a great
amount of danger and fear.

ANICCHAYAPI DAHATI SPRSTO HUTAVAHO YATHA
TATHA DAHATI GOVINDA NAMA VYAJAD APIRITAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/328 from PADMA PURANA spoken by Narada Muni)

 Just as if a person unknowingly touches fire, it certainly burns, similarly
if someone can be tricked into chanting the holy name of Govinda, all of his
sins will be burned into ashes.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.2.14)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.2.15)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.2.18)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.13.8)

VARTAMANANTU YAT PAPAM YAD BHUTAM YAD BHAVISYATI
TAT SARVAM NIRDAYATYASU GOVINDA ANALA-KIRTANAT

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/339 from LAGHU BHAGAVAT)

 Whatever sins one has acquired presently, in the past or in the future, are
all turned into ashes by chanting the fiery holy name of the Supreme
Personality of Godhead.

PARAK-CANDRAYANA TAPTA KRCCHRAIR NA DEHISUDDHIR BHAVATIHATADRK
KALAU SAKRN MADHAVA-KIRTANENA GOVINDA NAMANA BHAVATIHAYADRK

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/374 from BRAHMANDA PURANA)

 In Kali-yuga, if one chants the holy name of Madhava, says "Govinda,
Govinda", whatever sins are removed from one's body, it is difficult to remove
that many sins by fasting (paraka - a short duration of fasting), candrayana
fasting, performing great austerities, and observing many vows of
spirituality, that much purity is not attained from such activities.

GOVINDETI MUDA YUKTAH KIRTAYED YASTU ANANYA DHIH
PAVANENA CA DHANYENA TENEYAM PRTHIVI DHRTA

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/349 from LAGHU BHAGAVAT)

 If, with a pleasing attitude, any person chants the holy name of Govinda, he
is glorified, purified and he helps the whole world to be liberated.

NA SAMBA VYADHIJAM DUHKHAM HEYAM NANYAUSADHAIR API
HARINAMA AUSADHAM PITVA VYADHIS TYAJYO NA SAMSAYAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/354 from PARASARA SAMHITA Vyasa speaks to Samba)

 If somebody cannot remove the misery caused by disease by taking prescribed
medicine, then by chanting the name of Lord Hari and continuing taking
medicine, one can remove his disease. Of this there is no doubt.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 12.12.48)

ARTA VISANNAH SITHILAN CA BHITA
GHORESU CA VYADHISU VARTAMANAH
SANKIRTYA NARAYANA SABDAM EKAM
VIMUKYA DUHKHAH SUKHINO BHAVANTI

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/360 from VISNU DHARMOTTARA)

 Any person who is disturbed due to sadness, or who is miserable due to
intolerable poverty, has a broken limb in his body, or is fearful from his
enemies or suffering from a chronic disease, he should always chant the holy
name of Lord Narayana and he will become free from all miseries.

NAMA SANKIRTANAM KRTVA KSUTRT SKHALITA ADASU
VIYOGAM SIGHRAM APNOTI SARVA ANARTHAIR NA SAMSAYAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/363 from VISNU DHARMOTTARA)

 At the time of hiccups, or thirst, or at the time of difficulty, if somebody
chants the holy name of Lord Hari, he immediately becomes free from all kinds
of problems.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.2.46)

MAMA NAMANI LOKE'SMIN SRADDHAYA YASTU KIRTAYET
TASYA APARADHA KOTISTU KSAMAMY EVA NA SAMSAYAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/375 from VISNU YAMALA spoken by the Supreme Lord)

 To any person in this world who chants My name, even without faith, I forgive
10 million of their acquired offenses without a doubt.

VISNOR EKAIKA NAMAPI SARVA VEDADHIKAM MATAM
TADRNG NAMA SAHASRENA RAMA NAMA SAMAM SMRTAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/380 from PADMA PURANA)

 One name of Lord Sri Visnu rewards more results than the study of Vedic
literatures. Furthermore, one name of Lord Rama is equal to one thousand names
of Lord Visnu.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 3.33.7)

TE DHANYAS TE KRTARTHAS CA TAIR EVA SUKRTAM KRTAM
TAIRAPIAM JANMANAH PRAPYAM YE KALE KIRTAYANTI MAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/394 from VARAHA PURANA)

 Those people are glorified, liberated, have performed all kinds of
meritorious functions, and have achieved anything to be achieved in life who
chant My glories at fixed times.

 Sanatana Gosvami says the fixed times are bathing times, etc. or also in
unclean times.

TATHA CAIVOTTAMAM LOKE TAPAH SRI HARI KIRTANAM
KALAU YUGE VISESENA VISNU PRITYAIH SAMACARET

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/397 from SKANDA PURANA)

 Chanting the holy name of Lord Sri Hari is the topmost austerity in this
world. Therefore, in Kali-yuga, to please Lord Visnu, one should chant the
holy names of Lord Hari.

NA DESA KALA NIYAMO NA SAUCA ASAUCA NIRNAYAH
PARAM SANKIRTANAD EVA RAMA RAMA ITIM UCYATE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/411 from VAISVANARA SAMHITA)

 Anyone who chants the name of Lord Rama, saying "Rama Rama", he gets
liberated. There are no hard and fast rules concerning time, place,
cleanliness and uncleanliness and other circumstances to chant this.

APY ANYA CITTO'SUDDHO VA YAH SADA KIRTAYED HARIM
SO'PI DOSA KSAYAN MUKTIM LABHEC CEDIPATIR YATHA

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/418 from BRAHMA PURANA)

 Any person who unalloyedly, even in an unclean condition, always chants the
holy names of Lord Hari, achieves liberation achieved by the King of Cedi
(Sisupala), and all of his faults are forgiven.

PRANA PRAYANA PATHEYAM SANSARA VYADHI BHESAJAM
DUHKA SOKA PARITRANAM HARIR ITY AKSARA DVYAYAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/423 from BHARATA VIBHAGA)

 The two words, "ha-ri" is the real path of life when the life leaves the
body, and the real medicine to become free from the disease of material
existence, and means to remove distress and lamentation.

 Sanatana Gosvami says in his Digdarsini-tika: At the time of giving up one's
body, he must create a path for going back to Godhead by chanting the holy
name of Lord Hari. This chanting medicine removes the disease of this material
existence and gives liberation from this world. One should become free from
the miseries of life. In other words, one should look for the solution to
become free from the miseries. In other words, one should become free from the
miseries of not attaining love of Godhead. To become free from misery means to
attain the Vaikuntha planets. Furthermore, what else can be said? This
chanting removes the miseries of this world and the next as stated in Visnu
Dharma. Prahlada Maharaja says, "This chanting is the real path of the soul."

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 3.9.15)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.3.24)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.2.49)

YE KIRTA YANTI VARADAM VARA PADMA NABHAM
SANKHABJA CAKRA SARA CAPA GADASI HASTAM
PADMALAYA VADANA PANKAJA SAT PADAKSAM
NUNAM PRAYANTI SADANAM MADHU GHATINASTE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/437 from VAMANA PURANA)

 Any person who chants the holy name of Lord Hari, Who is the benedicting
personality, Who is addressed as lotus-naveled one, Who holds the conchshell,
club, disc and lotus flower, wearing a nice garment, has a bow and arrows, and
Who has reddish eyes like lotus petals, they certainly attain the spiritual
world.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 12.3.51)

RNAM ETAT PRAVRDDHAM ME HRDAYAN NAPASARPATI
YAD GOVINDA ITI CUKROSA KRSNA MAM DURAVASINAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/445 from MAHABHARATA spoken by the Supreme Lord)

 Because Draupadi called Me saying "Oh Govinda", that is why I became greatly
indebted to her. This feeling does not go away from My heart.

 Srila Sanatana Gosvami says in his Digdarsini-tika that when somebody cries,
saying "Oh Govinda", then the Supreme Lord becomes controlled and His heart
becomes very attached to him. In other words, the Lord thinks of His crying
devotee.

JITAN TENA JITAN TENA JITAN TENA ITI NISCITAM
JINVAGRE VARTATE YASYA HARIR ITI AKSARA DVAYAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/449 from VISNU DHARMA spoken by Prahlada Maharaja)

 If anyone has the two syllables HA and RI on the tip of his tongue, he has
undoubtedly controlled Lord Hari.

MADHURA MADHURAM ETAN MANGALAM MANGALANAM
SAKALA NIGAMA-VALLI SATPHALAM CIT SVARUPAM
SUKRDAPI PARIGITAM SRADDHAYA HELAYA VA
BHRGUVARA NARA MATRAM TARAYET KRSNA NAMA

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/451 from PRABHASA KHANDA of SKANDA PURANA and PADMA
PURANA)

 Oh descendants of Bhrgu, the chanting of the holy names of Krsna is the
sweetest of the sweetest, the most auspicious of auspicious things, the
eternal fruit of the sacred vine (essence of sacred Vedas) and is
transcendental. If somebody chants with faith or disrespect even once, it can
deliver all humankind.

DHYAYAN KRTE YAJAN YAJNAIS TRETAYAM DVAPARE 'RCAYAN
YAD APNOTI TAVAPNOTI KALAU SANKIRTYA KESAVAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/456 from VISNU PURANA)

 In Satya-yuga, there was meditation. In Treta-yuga, there was fire
sacrifices. Whatever result was attained in Dvapara-yuga by worshiping Lord
Hari, in Kali-yuga they achieved the same result by chanting the holy name of
Lord Sri Hari.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 12.3.52)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 11.5.32)

MAHA BHAGAVATA NITYAM KALAU KURVANTI KIRTANAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/459 from SKANDA PURANA)

 Greatly advanced personalities certainly daily chant the holy name of Lord
Hari in Kali-yuga.

NAMA YUKTAN JANAN DRSTVA SNIGDHO BHAVATI YO NARAH
SA YATI PARAMAM STHANAM VISNUNA SAHA MODATE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/470 from ADI PURANA conversation between Lord Krsna and
Arjuna)

 Any person who by seeing a devotee who is engaged in chanting becomes very
pleased, achieves the transcendental abode, the spiritual world and enjoys
with Lord Sri Visnu.

SAHASRA NAMNAM PUNYANAM TRIRAVRTYA TU YAT PHALAM
EKAVRTYA TU KRSNASYA NAMA EKAM TAT PRAYACCHATI

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/488 from BRAHMANDA PURANA)

 Whatever results one attains by chanting one thousand pure names of Lord
Visnu, the same is attained by chanting one name of the direct incarnations of
Krsna.

KRSNA KRSNA ITI KRSNA ITI YO MAM SMARATI NITYASAH
JALAM BHITVA YATHA PADMAM NARAKAD UDDHARAYAMY AHAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/496 from NRSINGHA PURANA spoken by the Supreme Lord)

 Any person who chants My name, saying "Krsna, Krsna, Krsna!" I remove him
from the hellish condition of life as a lotus flower comes up through the
water.

NAMNAM MUKHYATARAM NAMA KRSNAKHYAM NE PARAM TAPAH
PRAYASCITTAM ASESANAM PAPANAM MOCAKAM PARAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/498 from PRABHASA KHANDA of SKANDA PURANA)

 (The Supreme Personality of Godhead spoke to Narada Muni) Oh austere sage,
among all of My names, Krsna is the best. This name cleans up all of one's
sins and gives one liberation in this world.

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 2.3.24)

OM ASYA JANANTO NAMA
CID VIVIKTANA MAHASTE
VISNO SUMATIM BHAJAMAHE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/510 from SRUTI)

 Oh Lord Visnu, we will seriously chant Your holy names which is full of
knowledge, full of pleasure and gives good intelligence.

ARTHAVADA HARER NAMNI SAMBHAVAYATI YO NARAH
SA PAPISTHO MANUSYANAM NIRAYE PATATI SPHUTAM

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/514 from KATYAYANA SAMHITA)

 Any person who thinks to give his own interpretation about the holy name of
Lord Hari, this man is the most sinful among all kinds of men.

SRUTI-SMRTI-PURANESU NAMA MAHATMYA VACISU
YE'RTHA VADA ITI BRUYUR NA TESAM NIRAYA KSAYA KSAYAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/516 from JAIMINI SAMHITA)

 Any person who gives his own interpretation on the glories of the holy name
of the Supreme Lord and on the Sruti and Smrti scriptures and says that they
are not facts, they never become free from hellish suffering conditions.

HARER APY APARADHAN YAH KURYAT DVIPAD PANSANAH
NAMA ASRAYAH KADACIT SYAT TARATY EVA SA NAMATAH
NAMNO'PI SARVA SUHRDO HY APARADHAT PATATY ADHAH

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/520 from PADMA PURANA Sanat Kumara instructs Narada
Muni)

 If the lowest of mankind commits offenses at the lotus feet of Lord Hari but
then takes shelter at the lotus feet of Lord Hari and chants His holy name,
all offenses are nullified. Therefore, if someone commits offenses to the
Lord's holy name, he goes to suffer in the hellish planets without a doubt.

Quote the Sanskrit verses from C.C. about the 10 offenses.

JATE NAMAPARADHE 'PI PRAMADENA KATHANCANA
SADA SANKIRTAYANNAMA TADEKA SARANO BHAVET

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/525 from PADMA PURANA Sanat Kumara instructs Narada
Muni)

 Due to unconsciousness or due to certain reasons, if somebody accumulates
offenses against the holy name, he should engage himself in always chanting
the holy names of Lord Hari to become free from such offenses.(HK the means,
the remedial and the end)

JANMANTARA SAHASRESU TAPO JNANA SAMADHIBHIH
NARANAM KSINA PAPANAM KRSNE BHAKTI PRAJAYATE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/532 from YOGAVASISTHA)

 Any person who has removed all of his sins after performing austerity and
acquiring knowledge for thousands of births, they attain the opportunity of
doing devotional service at the lotus feet of the Supreme Lord Sri Krsna.

(BHAGAVAD GITA 7.28)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 6.1.15)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 1.5.17)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 1.2.6)

KIM TASYA BAHUBHIR MANTRAIH SASTRAIH KIM BAHU VISTARAIH
VAJAPEYA SAHASRAIH KIM BHAKTIR YASYA JANARDANE

(HARI BHAKTI VILASA 11/560 from PADMA PURANA)

 If somebody has developed fixed and determined devotion to Lord Sri Krsna,
then what is the need of his chanting different mantras and japa or studying
different kinds of scriptures or performing thousands of horse sacrifice vows?

(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 5.18.12)
(SRIMAD BHAGAVATAM 4.22.39)

please chant
  hare krishna hare krishna krishna krishna hare hare
  hare rama hare rama rama rama hare hare

...the sublime and simple method for reawakening our self realization
in this age of Kali.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Upa-shastra
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LESSONS FROM THE GEESE
This has nothing to do with any specific issue, it is only for fun
and reflection, following is a little witicism of wisdom:

LESSONS FROM THE GEESE
We have lessons to learn even from the geese........

Lesson 1. When each goose flaps its wings, it creates uplift for the bird
following.  By flying in a "V" formation, the whole flock adds 71 percent
more to their flying range than  as if each bird flew alone. People who
share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are
going more quickly and more easily because they are traveling on the
strength of one another.

Lesson 2:  When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag
and resistance of trying to fly alone and quickly gets back into formation
to take advantage of the lifting power of the birds immediately in front. If
we have as much sense as  geese have, we will join in formation and be
willing to accept help when we need it and give help when it is needed.

Lesson 3:  When the lead goose gets tired, it rotates back into formation and
another goose flies at the point position. It pays to take turns doing the
hard tasks and - with people, as with geese  -  sharing leadership
independently with one another and without resentment.

Lesson 4:  Geese in formation  work from behind (by honking) to encourage
those up front to keep up their speed.  We need to make sure that our
honking from behind is encouraging - not something less helpful - like
screeching!

Lesson 5:  When a goose gets sick or wounded or shot down, two geese will drop
out of the formation and follow their members down to help with protection.
If we have as much sence as the geese, we'll stand by one another in
difficult times, just as they do.

from Dick E. Bird News
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Four more good Lessons

LESSON #1

During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a
pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and breezed through the questions
until I read the last one:
"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this
was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She
was tall, dark-haired, and in her 50s, but how would I
know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
Before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count
toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers,
you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your
attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello."
I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LESSON #2

I was taking my usual morning walk when a garbage truck pulled up beside
me. I thought the driver was going to ask for directions. Instead, he
showed me a picture of a cute little five-year-old boy. "This is my
grandson Jeremiah," he said. "He's on a life-support system at a Phoenix
hospital." Thinking he would next ask for a contribution to his hospital
bills, I reached for my wallet.
But he wanted something more than money. He said, "I'm asking everybody I
can to say a prayer for him. Would you say one for him, please?" I did.
And my problems didn't seem like much that day.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LESSON #3

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old
boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put
a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" asked
the boy. "Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled his
hand out of his pocket and studied a number of coins in
it. "How much is a dish of plain ice cream?" he inquired.
Some people were now waiting for a table and the waitress was a bit
impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she said brusquely. The little boy again
counted the coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.
The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked
away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and departed. When
the waitress came back, she began wiping down the table, then swallowed
hard at what she saw. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two
nickels and five pennies- her tip, which could have bought him his sundae.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LESSON #4

In ancient times, a king had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid
himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of
the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked
around it. Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear,
but none did anything about getting the big stone out of the way. Then a
peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables.
On approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to
move the stone to the side of the road.
After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded.
As the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a
purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained
many gold coins and a note from the king indicating that the gold was for
the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned
what many others never understand.
Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve one's condition.

From Temple Thoughts:
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|)<>(|)<>(       At Grass Roots:     )<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<>(
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Dealing with the obstacles in our path(s).

      In ancient times, a king had a boulder placed on a
 roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone
 would remove the huge rock. Some of the kingdom's wealthiest
 merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it.
 Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear,
 but none did anything about getting the big stone out of the
 way. Then a peasant came along, carrying a load of
 vegetables. On approaching the boulder, the peasant laid
 down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of
 the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally
 succeeded.
      As the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he
 noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had
 been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from
 the king indicating that the gold was for the person who
 removed the boulder from the roadway.
      The peasant learned what many others never understand:
 Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve one's
 condition.
 
  By Brian Cavanaugh
                     [CSFS]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ohu vaha ho
ohu vaha ho
ohu vaha ho (oh how wonderous x3)

Announcement:

                            .-"''-.  _
                          .'       `( \
                        @/            ')   ,--,__,-"
                        /        /      \ /     /   _/
                      __|           ,   |/         /
                    .~  `\   / \ ,  |   /
                  .~      `\    `  /  _/   _/
                .~          `\  ~~`__/    /
                ~             `--'/
                             /   /    /
                            /  /'    /

Purohit Jvala Nrisimha dasa and his good wife Srimati Pandurani mataji
have just last Sunday been blessed with another "Ray of Vishnu", a
baby girl.

Both mother and baby are happy and healthy.

...to send congratulations mailto:<jvala_nrsimha@xtra.co.nz>
 

                     _(_)_                          wWWWw   _
         @@@@       (_)@(_)   vVVVv     _     @@@@  (___) _(_)_
        @@()@@ wWWWw  (_)\    (___)   _(_)_  @@()@@   Y  (_)@(_)
         @@@@  (___)     `|/    Y    (_)@(_)  @@@@   \|/   (_)\
          /      Y       \|    \|/    /(_)    \|      |/      |
       \ |     \ |/       | / \ | /  \|/       |/    \|      \|/
         |//   \\|///  \\\|//\\\|/// \|///  \\\|//  \\|//  \\\|//
     ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
If you have any news, events, functions, deals, etc., that you would
like to share with members then please do so by sending what you have
to us, we can pass them on in the next newsletter.

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|)<>(|)<>(       Prasadam Recipies:          )<>(|)<>(|)<>(|)<>(
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Here's one from my wife - Srimati Vedavati devi dasi.

Butterscotch Pudding (I can vouch for this its yummy)

Pudding
1 cup SR Flour  )
3/4 cup sugar   ) Mix all together - melted butter, etc.
1/2 cup milk    ) Put into buttered pudding dish on bottom.
60 g butter     )

Sauce
30 g melted butter with 1 1/2 cups hot water and 2 tablespoons golden
syrup.

Pour gently over pudding mixture and cook for approx 40 minutes in
moderate oven.

Variations:  Any fresh or canned fruit.  Put fruit on bottom and pour
over juice.  It is also nice with carob.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Greek Spinach Pie

From: (Evangelos Doussis)

[a light, low-fat dish, brilliant for lunch at work served hot, warm,
or cold]

the dough :
-----------
3 cups all purpose flour
1 cup warm water
2 tbl spoons oil
1/2 spoon oregano
dash of salt

mix ingredients; knead for about 2-3 minutes;
adding flour to until it doesn't stick to the hands -
separate into 3 equal parts

the filling :
------------
about one pound of thawed frozen spinach-
if you prefer the chopped fresh leaves kind
1 tsp hing - asofetida powder
(to replace 1/3 white onion in flavour)
1/2 cup finely chopped parsley
1/3 pound feta cheese
(totally optional I actually prefer it without)
salt, pepper, thyme

mix ingredients

the assembly :
-------------
roll out the 3 dough balls - so that each one is a bit bigger than your
baking pan (I use 8x12 in.) - the amount of dough, for that size will
give you the right thickness
place the first layer on the greased pan, with ends hanging over the
pan rim - add half the filling
follow on with the second dough layer -add the rest of the filling
finish off with the last dough layer; fold the dough layers together
pluck a few holes, making sure you go through the
second layer of dough
bake for 3/4 hour at around 400F
(from mara)
*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
ITCH PILAF -  ~ From HYENIKOMSHIA@xxxx

1 cup #1 bulgur
1 small can tomato sauce
(sorry, I forget how many ozs, but it is the smallest kind of generic,
cooking style sauce sold - about 4-6  ozs)
1/2 can of tomato sauce can worth of water
salt
paprika
juice of 1.5 lemons
chopped parsley and chives

Mix bulgur, tomato sauce and water.
Wait until liquid is absorbed.
Add  the rest of the ingredients to taste.

kwvegan vegan

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BABY POTATOES WITH ROSEMARY

INGREDIENTS:
5 pounds assorted small potatoes, each cut into quarters
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/2 teaspoon coarsely ground black pepper
rosemary sprigs for garnish

METHOD:
Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Place potatoes in large
roasting pan (17" by 11 1/2"); toss with olive oil, chopped
rosemary, salt, and pepper. Roast potatoes 30 to 40 minutes,
turning occasionally with metal spatula, until golden and
fork-tender. Garnish with rosemary sprigs.

Serves 10
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you have any recipies that you'd like to share with us please
send them to us and we'll include them in future newsletters.
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)<>(|)<>(  Krishna Conscious - Vedikly acceptable Jokes:  )<>(|)<
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[Text 1744168 from COM]

This new bhakta was very attracted to one very popular guru, but was so
timid he never had the courage to speak to him.  In fact, he told the temple
commander that every time he got near the guru, he felt like nothing more
than a tiny pebble.

"Well," the temple commander who also used to be a therapist before joining,
responded, "If you want to get initiated you'll just have to be a little
boulder!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Text 1696804 from COM]

I, me, mine
Here I sit and pine
Yesterday I was in the womb
Tomorrow I'll be in the tomb!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kamsa's demoniac friends said:

"Although Lord Visnu, Lord Siva, and Lord Brahma are always ready to help the
demigods headed by Indra, we have no reason to be afraid of them.  As far as
Lord Visnu is concerned, He has already hidden Himself within the hearts of
all living entities, and He cannot come out."  Chapter 4 Krsna Book

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HOT AIR
A man flying in a hot air balloon near South Fallsburg realizes
that he is lost.  He spots a person on the ground, reduces his altitude, and
shouts, "Hey! Can you tell me where I am?"  The person below says, "Yes,
you're in a hot air balloon hovering 30 feet above this field.  "You must
work as a spiritual teacher," says the balloonist.  "I do," replies the
person, "How did you know?"  "Well," says the balloonist, "what you told me
is true enough, but it's of no use at all."  The person below said, "You
must be a spiritual seeker."  "I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did
you know?"  "Well," says the person, "you don't know where you are, or where
you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same
position you were in before we met, but now it's my fault."
(Hari Sauri dasa Text COM:1564919) -----------------------------------------
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Text 2651358 from COM]

Once upon a time three pieces of string were walking down the street. One of
them was thirsty and went into a juice bar for a drink. The bartender said,
"Are you a piece of string?"

"Yes."

"We don't allow your kind in here. Get lost!"

He ran out and told the others what happened. The second piece of string
decided to try his luck because he was also thirsty. Again the bartender
said, "You are a piece of string?"

"Yes, I am."

"I said we don't serve your kind. Get out of here!"

He also ran outside. But the third piece of string was very thirsty. Before
going into the juice bar he ruffled up his ends and twisted himself up. Then
he marched into the bar and demanded,

"Give me a drink."

The bartender looked him up and down: "Aren't you a piece of string?"

"No, I'm afraid not."

    ...as told by Jambavan dasa (Vrndavana)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Text 1770087 from COM]

ONE DAY IN THE PSYCHIATRIST'S OFFICE

A man goes into his psychiatrist's office and says, "Doc, you have got
to HELP me! . . .

"Every night I keep dreaming that I'm a SPORTS CAR! . . .

"The  other night I dreamed I was a TRANS AM. . . . .

"And another night I dreamed I was an MERCEDES. . . .

"Last night I dreamed I was a PORCHE . . .

"Tell me, Doc, what does all this MEAN?"

"RELAX!" says the doctor, "...You're just having an AUTO-BODY EXPERIENCE!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"My wife, Rupa Manjari told me this one a few years ago".(Prananath dasa CHCH)

Once  there was a married couple who used to fight all the time. (sound
familiar?) Every day the husband would come from work & they would immediately
start arguing.
The wife finally decided that she would go & see her doctor. Maybe he could
help the situation.  She was at her wits end, & fearing the worst (separation
or DIVORCE!) she pleaded to the doctor to help. The doctor, who was old &
wise, listened very carefully to the ladies tale of woe. He thought for some
time & finally said to her that he had a small bottle of mystical potion which
would solve her problems. He fetched the bottle out and, to her delight, gave
it to her.
The instructions on the bottle were very simple. When her husband came home
from work, she would immediately take 1 tsp of the potion & hold it in her
mouth, without swallowing, for as long as possible.
A few days passed, then a week, and finally a month later the lady returned to
see the doctor. She was full of praise for him & his potion which had
completely transformed their marriage. She was so happy but the potion was
almost gone & fearing that if she didn't get more things might revert to the
previous state she asked him could she have some more? He said of course, took
the bottle to the sink & filling it up with water, he handed it back to her.
Suddenly she realised........

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Direct line to the Lord
(from Sunil Raju formerly in Wellington, now in Melbourne, Aus - still with us)

The Chief Pujari of ISKCON, Vrindavan and the Pope are in a meeting in
Rome. The Pujari notices an unusually fancy phone on a side table in
the Pope's private chambers.

"What is that phone for?" he asks the pontiff.

"It's my direct line to the Lord!"

The Pujari is skeptical, and the Pope notices. The Holy Father insists
that the Pujari try it out, and, indeed, he is connected to the
Lord. The Pujari holds a lengthy discussion with Him. After hanging
up, the Pujari says, "Thank you very much. This is great! But listen,
I want to pay for my phone charges."

The Pope, of course refuses, but the Pujari is steadfast and finally,
the pontiff gives in. He checks the counter on the phone and says,
"Alright! The charges were 1000,000 Lira. ($560)

The Chief Pujari gladly hands over a packet of bills. A few months
later, the Pope is in Vrindavan, India on an official visit. In the
Chief Pujari's chambers, he sees a phone identical to his and learns
it also is a direct line to the Lord. The Pope remembers he has an
urgent matter that requires divine consultation and asks if he can use
the Pujari's phone. The Pujari gladly agrees, hands him the phone, and
the Pope chats away. After hanging up, the Pope offers to pay for the
phone charges. This time, the Chief Pujari refuses to accept
payment. After the Pope insists, the Pujari relents and looks on the
phone counter and says: "Rs 10.00 !" ($0.25).

The Pope looks surprised: "Why so cheap!?"

The Pujari smiles: "Because it's a Local call."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Text 1707712 from COM]

1)To blaspheme the devotees who have dedicated their valuable time, money
and entire lives for using the e-mail.
2) To consider activities like chanting, hearing etc to be equal to or
independent of the reading e-mail.
3)To disregard the information received from the e-mail and consider it
irrelevant.
4)to blaspheme the e-mail messages and other messages in relation to e-mail.
5)to consider the glories of e-mail to be imagination.
6)To give some mundane interpretation of the e-mail and its messages.
7)To commit sinful activities on the strength of using e-mail.
8)To consider using the e-mail as one of the many ritualistic activities
mentioned in the worldly literatures.
9)To instruct faithless persons of the glories of using the e-mail.
10)To not have complete faith in the usage of e-mail and maintain other
methods of communication inspite of receiving many instructions in this
regard. It is also an offense to be inattentive while using the e-mail.
Anyone who claims to be an e-mail user must carefully guard against all these
offenses in order to quickly achieve the desired success which is "e-mail
prema."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 

This was in the "Bob Levey's Washington" column in the Washington
Post.  Every year he compiles and prints the "Best T-shirts of the
Summer":

1) (around a picture of dandelions) I Fought the Lawn and the Lawn Won
2) I Suffer Occasional Delusions of Adequacy
3) God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends
4) At My Age, I've Seen It All, Done It All, Heard It All... I Just Can't
Remember It All
5) My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips
6) I Just Do What The Voices Inside My Head Tell Me To Do
7)If It's Called Tourist Season, Why Can't We Hunt Them?
8)Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes, Seeks Frog
9) No, It Doesn't Hurt (on a "well-tattooed gentleman")
10)(on the back of a passing motorcyclist) if You Can Read This, My Wife
Fell Off
11) I Used To Be Schizophrenic, But We're OK Now
12)(Over the outline of the state of Minnesota)-My Governor Can Beat Up Your
Governor
13) Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came. I Saw. I Did a Little Shopping.
14) What If The Hokey Pokey Is Really What It's All About
15)(on the Front) Yale Is Just One Big Party (on the back) With a $25,000
Cover Charge
16)Liberal Arts Major...Will Think For Money
17)Growing Old is Inevitable; Growing Up is Optional
18) IRS -- Be Audit You Can Be
19)Gravity...It's Not Just a Good Idea.  It's the Law.
20) If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In the Kitchen
22) The Old Pro...Often Wrong...Never In Doubt
23) If At First You Don't Succeed, Skydiving Isn't For You
24) Old Age Comes at a Bad Time
25) In America, Anyone Can Be President. That's One of the Risks You Take.
26) First Things First, but Not Necessarily in That Order.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
from Kanai Thakur das [Text 2662426 from COM]
Iskcon Baroda, India.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In due course a Krishna conscious joke book will be found at:

http://members.xoom.com/hknetworks/hasya-raasa-contents-page.htm
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)<>(|)<>(    A Grateful Word to our Supporters:     )<>(|)<>(|)<
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We now have over 500 devotees that this newsletter goes out to:

Many thanks to all the readers who have one way or another subscribed
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