Healing with humour: Taking better care of ourselves  =>;-))
http://www.hknet.org.nz/healthNhumour.html
Visit our Hasya Rasa pages

Laughter Therapy - its no joke:
http://www.healthlibrary.com/reading/yod/march98/news.htm

        So Lord Caitanya is known as the one:

 - hasya-kari  &  hasya-yuk  ==> who laughs & jokes

 - hasya-priya  ==> who is fond of joking

 - hasya-nagara ==> who is the hero of those expert in speaking joking words

 - hasya-grami  &  hasya-kara  ==> is expert at joking

 - pushpa-hasa  ==> whose smile & laugh are as charminng as flowers.

Lord Gauranga's smiling & laughing qualities ki...

                                                ys Radhe Govinda dasa

P.S. One of the qualities of Srimati Radharani is that she is very expert in the art of joking.

SOME FACTS ABOUT HUMOUR

"With devotion steeped in love and affection, the yogi should meditate within the core of his heart upon the laughter of Lord Vishnu. The laughter of Vishnu is so captivating that it can be easily meditated upon. When the Supreme Lord is laughing, one can see His small teeth, which resemble jasmine buds rendered rosy by the splendor of His lips. Once devoting his mind to this, the yogi no longer desires to see anything else." ~ S.P., Srimad-Bhagavatam 3-23-33 "Kapila's Instructions on Devotional Service"

SCIENCE - After surgery but prior to the administration of pain medication, patients were told one-liner jokes. Those patients who were exposed to the humor experienced less pain in comparison to the other surgery patients who didn't get a dose of humor as part of their therapy. ~ Summary from study published in  ' Journal of Holistic Nursing'

Medical experts (Dr. Derk & Dr. Wiilliiamsburg) reveal that a powerful laugh will relax tensed muscles, brings more oxygen into the system and more quickly, lowers blood pressure, and offers a free, overall health benefits on many levels! And its free!. (If the FDA could manufacture a medicine like this, they'd charge a bundle.)

Loma Linda University Cali study by Dr. Lee Berk and Dr. Stanley Tan showed that physiological responses that were produced from belly laughter, were the opposite of what is seen in classical stress, thereby offering yet more evidence that laughing produces healthy or positive emotions.

Results of research by Dr. Lee Berk and Dr. Stanley Tan (Loma Linda U of Ca) indicated that after a good belly laugh, there is a general increase in activity within the immune system, such as: increased number and activity level of natural killer cells that attack viral infected cells and some types of cancer and tumor cells.

If it tickles your funny bone then chances are it will reduce the stress in your life and leave your immune system to do its part. This premise has been supported by both the field of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences. A recent publication with research data appeared in the Journal of the American Medical Association. Skin welt sizes were compared in patients suffering from severe allergies after one group watched a video featuring Charlie Chaplin and the other group listened to a documentary on weather. Needless to say, the Japanese study confirmed a reduction in skin welt size in the group watching the famed comedian. [FROM CNN.COM]  CHICAGO, ILLINOIS, February 13, 2001:

MORE SCIENTIFIC FINDINGS ABOUT LAUGHTER

* Laughter stimulates physical healing.
* Laughter enhances our individual creativity.
* Laughter is rejuvenating and regenerating.
* Laughter is good for relationships (that includes friendships).
* Laughter opens the heart.
* Laughter gives us a glimpse of freedom from the mind. (In other words, helpful for getting off the mental platform!)

~~ Articles by N. Lehrman in Archives of Internal Medicine, April 26,1993; Lee Berk, Dr. P.H. in Loma Linda University School of Medicine News, March 11,1999; N.Silver in American Health, November 1986; J. McCormick in Lancet, August 1994.

"We are less likely to succcummb to feelings of depression and helplessness if we are able to laugh at what is troubling us. Humor gives us a sense of perspective on our problems. Laughter provides an opportunity for the release of those uncomfortable emotions which, if held inside, may create biochemical changes that are harmful to the body." Patty Wooten, author of 'Pulmonary Rehabilitation: Guidelines to Success'

SCIENTIFIC FINDINGS - Controlled studies have given evidence that a good belly laugh has lowered serum cortisol levels, increased amounts of activated T lymphocytes, increased number and activity of natural killer cells, and increased the number of T cells that have helper/ suppresser receptors. Or to sum it up: laughter off-sets the immunosuppressive effects of stress and is therefore significantly improves the health of the immune system. - Discoveries by Dr. Berk and Dr. Tan, Loma Linda University.

Evidence (from EEG) revealed that when a joke is just about to be told, the initial anticipation results in  the brains cortex's left hemisphere starting the function of analyzing of word processing. Next, most brain activity moved to the frontal lobe (the center of emotions). After that, the right hemisphere's synthesis mix with the left's processing to look for and locate the pattern or to be able to "get" the joke. Very quickly following, though just prior to the persons had quite enough time to laugh, brain waves increase and spread to   the occipital lobe which is the sensory processing areas of the brain. There was an increase in fluctuations of delta waves which reached a crescendo of activity and crested as the brain 'got' the joke followed by the recipient beginning of laughter. So here you have 'scientific' knowledge how laughter works, integrating the brain and getting it to all function together, thanks to Dr. Derk & Dr. Williamsburg. Now, stop analyzing and start laughing! :-) You have facts that it's actually beneficial for a variety of health issues, so don't minimize its importance and start giving yourself permission to take out time each day to laugh.  Like a vitamin or even a meal, it's a necessity!

Courtesy of mother Pritaa ACBSP's site http://www.geocities.com/priitaa108/humor.htm

This is a MUST READ =>;-Q
http://www.digitalsawdust.com

Four Wives parable:
http://www.hknet.org.nz/4wives.pps

 Click on this link to see how really short life is.
http://www.sastradana.com/video/lifeisshort.wmv

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

Angry mouths flip out at a Press Conference
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym9hMtpk9d4

12 days of Xmas Indian style
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owK5tHjL0aE

"Out of Body - back in 5 mins"

Where’d Nityananda go?
I don’t know!

You know how when you go out on Hari-nama and the chanting gets real intense and devotees huddle around each other like a football huddle, and they hunch over and everybody’s face is all there in the center, all looking each other in the eyes, all grinning and chanting real loud? You know, the mrdanga players are beating the heck out of the drums, the kartal player’s hands are moving so fast that you can’t see them, just a blur? And the devotees are getting this mad look on their faces? And the dancing is getting wild, with occasion wild jumping up and down? And the chants are getting real intense and real loud, and people are gathering around in amazement, just gawking at the devotees? You know what I mean? Well, there was this bhakta who, for some reason, always heard the words wrong. The chanting party got into this huddle, and the lead singer would start, "Gour Nityananda bol!!" and the response singers would sing "Hari bol, Hari bol!!" You know? Well, the bhakta misheard them, and he thought the lead singer was yelling, "where'd Nityananda go??" Like it was some kind of big question to the others, like where did Nityananda go? Apparently the lead singer thought that Nityananda went off somewhere, and he wanted to know where. And then the bhakta thought that the response singers were answering his question, and singing, "I don’t know … I don’t know!!" You know, the lead singer was yelling the question, "where did Nityananda go??" staring into the others faces, mrdangas blazing, kartals clanging, and the others were enthusiastically yelling back into his face, with gleeful grins, "I don’t know! I don’t know!"

Then the lead singer would ask again, like he didn’t understand their answer, saying, "Well where? Oh where did Nityananda go??!!" Like he was thinking, "Hey man, you know, like I asked you once before, and all you say is "I don’t know," but you say it like you are happy that you don’t know!! So I’m asking again, and I’m serious," again, "where did Nityananda go??" And the devotees would again, respond in ecstatic glee, "I don’t know … I don’t know!!" Like it was some really ecstatic thing that they didn’t know where Nityananda went!!

Well, after about a year, the bhakta started to wonder what was going on. I mean like, its been a whole year, and the lead guy is always asking this question, "Where did Nityananda go?" And they’ve always been saying, "I don’t know … I don’t know!!" Like if he doesn't know by now, after a whole year, then why don’t he just give it up?? And why do they keep saying "I don’t know .. I don’t know"?? You know, if they don’t know, and they keep saying so, then why does he keep asking??? Well, eventually the bhakta came around and asked a godbother, "What is it, that they are saying??" Well, I guess he found out. Well, you know, Nityananda never went anywhere, he was always there with the chanting. Haribol, Haribol.

From Visoka prabhu's site http://www.geocities.com/visoka123/visoka/VCN/transcendental_humor.htm

After buying her kids a pet hamster, after they PROMISED they would take care of it, Mom, as usual, ended up with the responsibility.

One evening, exasperated, she asked them, "How many times do you think that hamster would have died if I hadn't looked after it?"

After a moment, her youngest son replied quizzically,
"errrrr....probably just once?"

When Mahatma Gandhi was asked what he thought of Western Civilization, he replied: "I think it would be a good idea."

There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meaning than
any other two-letter word, and that is "UP."

It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the
top of the list, but when we waken in the morning, why do we wake UP?

At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?

Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election
and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?

We call UP our friends, we use it to brighten UP a room, polish
UP the silver, we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the
kitchen. We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.

At other times the little word has real special meaning.

People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an
appetite, and think UP excuses.

We offer UP the bhoga and serve UP the prasadam.

To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.

And this is confusing:

A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.

We open UP the Deity room in the morning but we close it UP at night.

We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP.

.....but I guess that's UP to the individual.

(I'm sure you'll think of more......)

I used to believe in reincarnation, but that was in past life.

.....come on its monsoon give a fella a banana, er I mean a break

INDIAN WINTER (American Indian)

IT WAS ALREADY LATE FALL AND THE INDIANS ON A REMOTE RESERVATION IN SOUTH
DAKOTA ASKED THEIR NEW CHIEF IF THE COMING WINTER WAS GOING TO BE COLD OR MILD.

SINCE HE WAS A CHIEF IN A MODERN SOCIETY HE HAD NEVER BEEN TAUGHT THE OLD
SECRETS. WHEN HE LOOKED AT THE SKY HE COULDN'T TELL WHAT THE WINTER WAS
GOING TO BE LIKE.

NEVERTHELESS, TO BE ON THE SAFE SIDE, HE TOLD HIS TRIBE THAT THE WINTER WAS
INDEED GOING TO BE COLD AND THAT THE MEMBERS OF THE VILLAGE SHOULD COLLECT
FIREWOOD TO BE PREPARED.

BUT BEING A PRACTICAL LEADER, AFTER SEVERAL DAYS HE GOT AN IDEA. HE WENT TO
THE PHONE BOOTH, CALLED THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE AND ASKED, "IS THE
COMING WINTER GOING TO BE COLD?"

"IT LOOKS LIKE THIS WINTER IS GOING TO BE QUITE COLD," THE METEOROLOGIST AT
THE WEATHER SERVICE RESPONDED.

SO THE CHIEF WENT BACK TO HIS PEOPLE AND TO LD THEM TO COLLECT EVEN MORE
FIREWOOD IN ORDER TO BE PREPARED.

A WEEK LATER HE CALLED THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE AGAIN. "DOES IT STILL
LOOK LIKE IT IS GOING TO BE A VERY COLD WINTER?"

"YES," THE MAN AT NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE AGAIN REPLIED, "IT'S GOING TO BE
A VERY COLD WINTER."

THE CHIEF AGAIN WENT BACK TO HIS PEOPLE AND ORDERED THEM TO COLLECT EVERY
SCRAP OF FIREWOOD THEY COULD FIND.

TWO WEEKS LATER THE CHIEF CALLED THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE AGAIN. "ARE
YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE THAT THE WINTER IS GOING TO BE VERY COLD?"

"ABSOLUTELY," THE MAN REPLIED. "IT'S LOOKING MORE AND MORE LIKE I T IS GOING
TO BE ONE OF THE COLDEST WINTERS WE'VE EVER SEEN."

"HOW CAN YOU BE SO SURE?" THE CHIEF ASKED.

THE WEATHERMAN REPLIED, "THE INDIANS ARE COLLECTING FIREWOOD LIKE CRAZY."

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

A mother is driving a little girl to her friend's house for a play date.

"Mommy," the little girl asks, "how old are you?"

"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother replied.

"It's not polite."

"OK", the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"

"Now really," the mother says, "those are personal questions and are really none of your business."

Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?"

"That is enough questions, young lady, honestly!"

The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.

"My Mom won't tell me anything about her," the little girl says to her friend.

"Well," says the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license.  It is like a report card, it has everything on it."

Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."

The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?

"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."

The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
"How in heaven's name did you find that out?"

"And," the little girl says triumphantly,"I know why you and daddy got a divorce."

"Oh really?" the mother asks. "Why?"

"Because you got an F in sex."

Talking of noses.....

Meet Her Royal Highness, Her Majesty Queen Elizebeth II of England

QE2

He wouldn't be much use to the Queen - the man with the longest finger nails

It was time for the newest priest to start hearing the confessions of the congregation.
Feeling a bit nervous about it, he requests one of the older priest to sit in on his sessions.
Then the new priest hears a couple of confessions.

The old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.

The old priest suggests, "Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand."

So the new priest tries this.

Next, the old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, 'I see, yes, go on,' and 'I understand. How did you feel about that?'"

The new priest says those things.

Lastly, the old priest says, "Now, don't you think that's a better than slapping your knee and saying:
"You've GOT to be kidding! So..... THEN what happened after that?"

from Mother Pritaa's site http://www.geocities.com/priitaa108/humor.htm

A man went to NASA and asked for a ticket to the moon.
"Sorry, sir" said the attendant; "The moon is full right now."

Laugh and the world laughs with you,
snore and you sleep alone.

Anthony Burgess

.......for real this is at the Hotel Jumeirah in Dubai

An angry motorist went back to a garage where he'd purchased an expensive battery for his car six months earlier.

"Listen," the motorist grumbled to the owner of the garage, "When I bought that battery you said it would be the last battery my car would ever need.
It died after only six months!"

"Sorry," apologized the garage owner. "I didn't think your car would last longer than that."

  Did you ever wonder? 

.....need a new marketing manager

It finally happened

Buddhism: If a tree falls in a deserted forest, does it make a sound?

WG Bush: If you cut down a tree in a protected forest, did it happen?

CIA: If something happened to a tree in a protected area, why would you assume we made it happen?

After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of the same automobile accident, you begin to worry about history

A "mobile phone" carrier in Thailand

Two police officers respond to a crime scene behind a grocery store. The homicide detective is already there.
"What happened?" asks the first officer. "Male, about twenty-five, covered in Raisin Bran and dead as a doornail."
"Good grief," says the second officer. "Didn't we have one covered in Frosted Flakes yesterday? And Captain Crunch last week?"
"You're right. I'm afraid," said the detective as he took a drink from his water bottle, "this is the work of a cereal killer."

On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said: "Let's see the evolutionists try and figure THIS one out."

from Mother Pritaa's site http://www.geocities.com/priitaa108/humor.htm

The ways of this material world - strange but true

House Boat

House Truck

A man walks into a cafe and orders a latee. As he sits there the jar of nuts on the table tells him what a nice shirt he is wearing. Disturbed by this he goes to the cigarette vending machine to buy a pack of smokes. As he approaches the machine it starts screaming and shouting at him. He runs to the table and explains this to the cafe owner. The cafe owner apologizes and says "That's right the peanuts are complimentary but the cigarette machine is out of order!"

Can any won relate to this???

I have a spelling checker,
It came with my PC;
It plainly marks four my revue,
Mistakes I cannot sea.
I've run this poem threw it,
I'm sure your please to no,
Its letter perfect in it's weigh,
My checker tolled me sew.

from http://www.geocities.com/priitaa108/humor.htm

Tommy Cooper jokes from Ken:

I was reading this book today, 'The History Of Glue,’and I couldn't put it down.

I phoned the local ramblers club today and this bloke just went on and on and on.

I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. It's tiny, you couldn't swing a cat in there!

I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."

I'm so lazy I've got a smoke alarm with a snooze button.

I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet 'Best Before End'

So I went to buy a watch, and the man in the shop said "Analogue ?" I said "No, just a watch."

I went into a shop and I said, "Can someone sell me a kettle." The bloke said "Kenwood" I said, "Where is he then?"

Banajee the psychiatrist got a postcard one morning from one of his patients.
It read, "Having a wonderful time. Wish you were here so you could tell me why."

...........why do elephants paint their toe nails red?

So they can hide in cherry trees.

Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?

See, its a very good disguise eh?

...........a hot day on the road with the bike

SCRAP-BOOK, n. A book that is commonly edited by a fool. Many persons of some small distinction compile scrap-books containing whatever they happen to read about themselves or employ others to collect. One of these egotists was addressed in the lines following, by Agamemnon Melancthon Peters:

Dear Frank, that scrap-book where you boast
You keep a record true
Of every kind of peppered roast
That's made of you;

Wherein you paste the printed gibes
That revel round your name,
Thinking the laughter of the scribes
Attests your fame;

Where all the pictures you arrange
That comic pencils trace --
Your funny figure and your strange
Semitic face --

Pray lend it me. Wit I have not,
Nor art, but there I'll list
The daily drubbings you'd have got
Had God a fist.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

East meets West

.......more optical illusions and paradigm twists here:

SCRIBBLER, n. A professional writer whose views are antagonistic to one's own.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

...imagine if an alien were to view this scene, they could easily misunderstand it as an ancient ritual bathing ceremony.

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.

One day they went to her place and had sex all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.
The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt. He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.

"I can't lie to you," he replied,

"I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

She looked down at his shoes and said: "You lying dog! You've been playing golf!"

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog.  The children started discussing the dog's duties.  They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No, said another, "he's just for good luck. "A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs", she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

A vaastu architect's nightmare

There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said,
"Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas."

When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands.
He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."

After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located.
The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door.
Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.

Scared to death, the blind man started shouting,

"Don't flush, don't flush!"

Please Try our little Colour Test - Right Brain vs Left Brain:
http://www.njagyouth.org/colortest.swf

I can't believe you actually clicked on that