Healing with humour: Taking better care of ourselves  =>;-))
http://www.hknet.org.nz/healthNhumour.html
Visit our Hasya Rasa pages

Laughter Therapy - its no joke:
http://www.healthlibrary.com/reading/yod/march98/news.htm

        So Lord Caitanya is known as the one:

 - hasya-kari  &  hasya-yuk  ==> who laughs & jokes

 - hasya-priya  ==> who is fond of joking

 - hasya-nagara ==> who is the hero of those expert in speaking joking words

 - hasya-grami  &  hasya-kara  ==> is expert at joking

 - pushpa-hasa  ==> whose smile & laugh are as charminng as flowers.

Lord Gauranga's smiling & laughing qualities ki...

                                                ys Radhe Govinda dasa

P.S. One of the qualities of Srimati Radharani is that she is very expert in the art of joking.

This is a MUST READ =>;-Q
http://www.digitalsawdust.com

Four Wives parable:
http://www.hknet.org.nz/4wives.pps

 Click on this link to see how really short life is.
http://www.sastradana.com/video/lifeisshort.wmv

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

12 days of Xmas Indian style
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owK5tHjL0aE

A parable for our times.....

ANT & THE GRASSHOPPER

OLD VERSION.....

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies  out in the cold.

MODERN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
 NDTV, BBC, CNN   show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper  next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house.

Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter. Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper. The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance). Opposition MP's stage a walkout.

Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry. CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.   Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by  NDTV. Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice". Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'. CPM calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden' Koffi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

*****************************************************
Many years later...
The ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi billion dollar company in Silicon Valley.

The World Press announce........100s of grasshoppers die of starvation somewhere in India...

sent in by Mohan Gupta

Confession

A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner.  He was delayed, so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited.

"I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.".....

Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk. "I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."



My English teacher announced to the class; "There are two words I don't allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool."

From the back of the room a voice called out, "So, what are the words?"

One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in the tiny town of Johnstown got up early and went to the local church.

Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc.

Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church.

Everyone started screaming and running for the exit, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from this evil incarnate.

Soon everyone was evacuated from the Church, except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.

Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said,

"Don't you know who I am?" The man replied "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you afraid of me?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried,
"Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied,
"Been married to your sister for 48 years..."

name withheld to protect the innocent

Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game (whose habits partially blocked the view), three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move.

In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."

The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns living there."

The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25 nuns living there."

One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm, voice said, "Why don't you go to Hell. There aren't any nuns there."

Did you ever wonder?

There is life on Mars.......

Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
To prevent the sensible ones from going home.

Man to wife:    "Boy, you are getting old, look at all the wrinkles you are getting!"

Wife:    "They aren't wrinkles, they're laugh lines!"

Man:     "Nothing is that freakin' funny!!"

Parking in South Auckland

Where those Aussies got the idea of Skippy from - Skipinder the Punjabi bush kangeroo
http://youtube.com/results?search_query=skipinder&search=Search

(a bit gross but funny - maharaj you were warned)

How dish washers work

Complaint

I wish to complain - the instructions on your deodorant were very misleading. I followed your instructions on a stick of deodorant to the letter:
'Take Off Top, Push Up Bottom', and was left semi-naked in some not inconsiderable pain.
And it didn't help my perspiring.

Now I understand my error, but it's time that the writers of these instructions take responsibility for the resulting actions.
The slogan on the front  - 'Sure Wont Let You Down', was correct, I was unable to sit down all morning.

Across the street

A young man was walking past an old woman on a street corner, when she said, "Son, if it is not too much trouble, can you see me across the street."

The young man said, "Just a minute."  Then he walked across the street, looked back and yelled, "Yes, I can see you!"

The ways of this material world - strange but true

 

.............and you wonder why the cost of oil and its bi-products are so high - someone has to pay for snow being in the desert.

sent in by Ali Kearns Q8

Nike has recalled more than 400 thousand defective shoes after reports that the poor workmanship may have injured 6 people.

A company spokesperson was upset, saying, "You just can't get good help for 75 cents a day anymore".

There was a dance teacher who talked of a very old dance called the Politician.

"All you have to do" she told her class "is take three  steps forward, two steps backward, then side-step side-step and turn  around."

QUORUM, n. A sufficient number of members of a deliberative body to have their own way and their own way of having it. In the United States Senate a quorum consists of the chairman of the Committee on Finance and a messenger from the White House; in the House of Representatives, of the Speaker and the devil.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

.....son of a beach !!!!

.......more optical illusions and paradigm twists here:

The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent
vows that they alone would care for it, they got one. They
named it Danny.

Two months later, when Mom found herself responsible for
cleaning and feeding the creature, she located a prospective
new home for it.

The children took the news of Danny's imminent departure
quite well, though one of them remarked, "He's been around
here a long time--we'll miss him."

"Yes," Mom replied, "But he's too much work for one person,
and since I'm that one person, I say he goes."

Another child offered, "Well, maybe if he wouldn't eat so much
and wouldn't be so messy, we could keep him."

But Mom was firm. "It's time to take Danny to his new home
now," she insisted. "Go and get his cage."

With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted,
"Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"

RACK, n. An argumentative implement formerly much used in persuading devotees of a false faith to embrace the living truth. As a call to the unconverted the rack never had any particular efficacy, and is now held in light popular esteem.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

The widow lay crying on her psychiatrist's couch. "We were married twenty-five years before he died," she said, dabbing away a tear.
"Never had an argument in all those years."

"Amazing," said the doctor. "How did you do it?"

"I outweighed him by forty pounds and he was a coward."

prasadam ki jaya 

Stupidity in bureaucracy:

A dead woman won an election to a rural school board in Alaska, on the toss of a coin.

Kathryn Denton died on the day of the election which left her and challenger tied.
Even with Denton's death, state law required a tie vote to be settled by lot after an official recount.

The unnamed challenger called heads, but the coin landed on tails. The school board must now find a replacement.

One devotee who was the mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist,
"You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly."

On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?"

"Yes," the boy's mother answered.

"And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked.

"Who cares?" the mother replied.

Finally...........

Don't expect to enjoy the cream of life if you keep
your milk of human kindness all bottled up.

Please Try our little Colour Test - Right Brain vs Left Brain:
http://www.njagyouth.org/colortest.swf