Newsletter Number #122 - Auckland Temple Opening issue ( Mid-January 2004 A.D.)

ki jaya


Please Accept My Respectful Obeisances & Best Wishes To All


All Glories To Srila Prabhupad.

/ \ All Glories to Sri Guru and Gauranga.

Welcome to the latest re-vamped edition of the on-line HKSRNewsletter, and our humble attempt to render some service. As you can see we've changed the format, and everything is here hyper-linked on-line, we hope it's now easier for you all. This newsletter now goes out to way over 2108 receivers. I trust that all is well with everyone by the Mercy of the Lord. However, if anyone would like to be removed please just send me a message requesting me to do so, and I will do it promptly. If you are receiving this from a friend, and would like to be added directly to the mailout please also let me know and I will do the needful there too. Removal and Subscription details at the very end of this newsletter.
Hare Krishna. =>B-) JTCd

The Nectar in this Issue

IN THIS ISSUE: (click on the hyper-linked underlined below to jump there...)
WWW - news and views: Calendar Updates & Events - Festivals, Feasts, Fasts & Functions:

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... Auckland Temple opening 16th-17th-18th Jan 2004
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At Grass Roots: Topical stuff
... Happy New Year - Gaurabda 517

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Makara Sankranti

Official Opening of the New Iskcon Auckland temple 16th - 17th - 18th January 2004

Fasting 4 Sat-tila Ekadasi - Fasting from Beans and Grains - 18th January 2004 in NZ

Ganga Sagara Mela

Vasant Panchami

Srimati Vishnupriya Devi - Avirbhav

Saraswati Puja

Srila Vishnvanath Chakravarthy Thakur - Tirubhav

Sri Pundarik Vidyanidhi - Avirbhav

Sri Raghunandan Thakur - Avirbhav

Srila Raghunath Dasa Goswami - Avirbhav

Sri Advaita Acharya - Avirbhava - (Fasting 'till noon)


Sripad Madhwacharya (Ananda Tirtha) - Tirubhav

Sripad Ramanujacharya - Tirubhav

Fasting 4 Bhaimi Ekadasi - Fasting from Beans and Grains - 2nd February 2004 in NZ
(Half Day fast for Lord Varhadev)

Appearance Day of Lord Varahadev
(The fast is observed 'till noon on ekadasi in NZ)(Feasting done today)

Appearance Day of Lord Nityananda - (Fasting 'till noon) (4th Feb in NZ)

Sri Krishna Madhura utsav

Srila Narottam Dasa Thakura - Avirbhav

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kasmad ekadasi jata tasyah ko va vidhir dvija
kada va kriyate kim va phalam kim va vadasva me

ka va pujyatama tatra devata sad-gunarnava
akurvatah syat ko dosa etan me vaktum arhasi

"Oh Gurudeva! When did Ekadasi take birth and from whom did she appear? What are the rules of fasting on the Ekadasi? Please describe the benefits of following this vow and when it should be followed. Who is the utmost worshippable presiding deity of Sri Ekadasi? What are the faults in not following Ekadasi properly? Please bestow your mercy upon me and tell about these subjects, as you are the only personality able to do so."

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Srimad Bhagavad Gita AS IT IS

The yoga of the Supreme Person

                                    TEXT 7

                          mamaivamso jiva-loke
                          jiva-bhutah sanatanah
                         prakrti sthani karsati

   mama--My; eva--certainly; amsah--fragmental particle; jiva-loke--in the world of conditional life; jiva-bhutah--the conditioned living entity; sanatanah--eternal; manah--with the mind; sasthani--the six; indriyani--senses; prakrti--in material nature;  sthani--situated; karsati--is struggling hard.

   The living entities in this conditioned world are My eternal fragmental parts. Due to conditioned life, they are struggling very hard with the six senses, which include the mind.

PURPORT by HDG Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada
In this verse the identity of the living being is clearly given. The living entity is the fragmental part and parcel of the Supreme Lord--eternally. It is not that he assumes individuality in his conditional life and in his liberated state becomes one with the Supreme Lord. He is eternally fragmented. It is clearly said, sanatanah. According to the Vedic version, the Supreme Lord manifests and expands Himself in innumerable expansions, of which the primary expansions are called visnu-tattva and the secondary expansions are called the living entities. In other words, the visnu-tattva is the personal expansion, and the living entities are the separated expansions. By His personal expansion, He is manifested in various forms like Lord Rama, Nrsimhadeva, Visnumurti and all the predominating Deities in the Vaikuntha planets. The separated expansions, the living entities, are eternally servitors. The personal expansions of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, the individual identities of the Godhead, are always present. Similarly, the separated expansions of living entities have their identities. As fragmental parts and parcels of the Supreme Lord, the living entities also have fragmental portions of His qualities, of which independence is one. Every living entity, as an individual soul, has his personal individuality and a minute form of independence. By misuse of that independence one becomes a conditioned soul, and by proper use of independence he is always liberated. In either case, he is qualitatively eternal, as the Supreme Lord is. In his liberated state he is freed from this material condition, and he is under the engagement of transcendental service unto the Lord; in his conditioned life he is dominated by the material modes of nature, and he forgets the transcendental loving service of the Lord. As a result, he has to struggle very hard to maintain his existence in the material world.

   The living entities, not only human beings and the cats and dogs, but even the greater controllers of the material world--Brahma, Lord Siva and even Visnu--are all parts and parcels of the Supreme Lord. They are all eternal, not temporary manifestations. The word karsati (struggling or grappling hard) is very significant. The conditioned soul is bound up, as though shackled by iron chains. He is bound up by the false ego, and the mind is the chief agent which is driving him in this material existence. When the mind is in the mode of goodness, his activities are good; when the mind is in the mode of passion, his activities are troublesome; and when the mind is in the mode of ignorance, he travels in the lower species of life. It is clear, however, in this verse, that the conditioned soul is covered by the material body, with the mind and the senses, and when he is liberated this material covering perishes, but his spiritual body manifests itself in its individual capacity. The following information is there in the Madhyandinayana-sruti: sa va esa brahma-nistha idam sariram martyam atisrjya brahmabhisampadya brahmana pasyati brahmana srnoti brahmanaivedam sarvam anubhavati.
   It is stated here that when a living entity gives up this material embodiment and enters into the spiritual world, he revives his spiritual body, and in his spiritual body he can see the Supreme Personality of Godhead face to face. He can hear and speak to Him face to face, and he can understand the Supreme Personality as He is. From smrti also it is understood, vasanti yatra purusah sarve vaikuntha-murtayah: in the spiritual planets everyone lives in bodies featured like the Supreme Personality of Godhead's. As far as bodily construction is concerned, there is no difference between the part-and-parcel living entities and the expansions of visnu-murti. In other words, at liberation the living entity gets a spiritual body by the grace of the Supreme Personality of Godhead.

   The words mamaivamsah (fragmental parts and parcels of the Supreme Lord) are also very significant. The fragmental portion of the Supreme Lord is not like some material broken part. We have already understood in the Second Chapter that the spirit cannot be cut into pieces. This fragment is not materially conceived. It is not like matter, which can be cut into pieces and joined together again. That conception is not applicable here, because the Sanskrit word sanatana (eternal) is used. The fragmental portion is eternal. It is also stated in the beginning of the Second Chapter that in each and every individual body the fragmental portion of the Supreme Lord is present (dehino 'min yatha dehe). That fragmental portion, when liberated from the bodily entanglement, revives its original spiritual body in the spiritual sky in a spiritual planet and enjoys association with the Supreme Lord. It is, however, understood here that the living entity, being the fragmental part and parcel of the Supreme Lord, is qualitatively one with the Lord, just as the parts and parcels of gold are also gold.

 - His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

Bhagavad Gita As It Is -

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Prabhupada Uvacha:
(here's some nectar, sometimes it comes in the form of Srutakirti prabhu's diary, other times from Govind dasi's diary, or sometimes from a letter, but still nectar...)

Short Story

In a lecture, Srila Prabhupada remarked that foolish people often criticise devotees as do-nothings and weaklings, but such people do not understand the intelligence of a devotee. Therefore, a devotee does not have to heed such people. To illustrate the point, Srila Prabhupada told a story.

Some labourers were criticising the minister of the king, claiming he only sat around and did no work. The king reminded them that it took intelligence to become a minister. He said that he would give a test for everyone including the minister. Whoever could pass the test could become the next minister. The king said, "Take this big elephant, weigh him, and let me know the exact weight."
The ordinary men were baffled. Where was there a scale for weighing an elephant? They could not do anything. They came back to the king with no information. Then the king turned to his minister and asked, "Will you kindly weigh this elephant?" So in six minutes he came back and reported, "It is twenty mounds (1.920lbs)." The other men were standing open-mouthed in surprise. "How is that?" they asked. "Within six minutes he came back and he gave the exact weight!"
The king asked, "How did you weigh him? Did you get some very big scale?"
"No sir," replied the minister. "It is not possible to weigh the elephant on a scale. It is very difficult."
"Then how did you weigh it?"
"I took it on a boat. When I got him on the boat then I saw the watermark and I marked it. Then, after getting the elephant off the boat, I added weight onto the boat, and when it came to the same watermark, then I understood."
So the king addressed the labourers and cautioned them. "Now you see the difference?" They agreed, "Yes".
After telling this story, Prabhupada quoted from scripture. "Buddhir yasya balim tasya-nirbuddhes tu kuto balam: one who has got intelligence, he has strength, and one who has no intelligence, a rascal, has no strength."
Prabhupada concluded, "Scientists, atheists, and different critics of devotees are like that - rascal - fools. We don't take advice from them," said Prabhupada. "We take advice from Krsna or His representative."

- From the Nectar by HH Satsvarupa Dasa Goswami

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Srimad-Bhagavatam 3.25.32
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mantratas tantratash chidram
sarvam karoti nishchidram
anusankirtanam tava

There may be discrepancies in pronouncing the mantras and observing the regulative principles,
and, moreover, there may be discrepancies in regard to time, place, person and paraphernalia.
But when Your Lordship’s holy name is chanted, everything becomes faultless.

Srimad Bhagavatam 8:23:16

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Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada. Srimad Bhagavatam  6:1:15, Auckland, New Zealand. 22nd February 1973. lecture excerpt.

A child at home without engagement, he will simply spoil things, so many. But if you send him to school, give him some engagement, he will be peaceful. Similarly, our senses, we cannot stop the activities of the senses. That is not possible. Just like some foolish people say that “Become desireless.” How you can be desireless? I am a living man, living being. I must desire. I cannot be desireless. But if the desire is transformed to Kåñëa... Suppose instead of desiring that “I shall have a very big skyscraper building,” if I desire that “I shall have a very big, big temple for Kåñëa.” The same desire. But as soon as you desire to have a big skyscraper building, that is material. And as soon as you desire to construct a big temple for Kåñëa, that is spiritual. Just like as you get a nice rose flower: as soon as you desire that you shall enjoy it, this is material. And as soon as you desire, “Oh, this is nice flower. I shall go and offer it to Kåñëa,” that is spiritual. Simply change the desire. There is no question of desirelessness. Why? We cannot be desireless... That is not possible. Change the... Purify the desire. Purify the desire.

Therefore bhakti means sarvopädhi-vinirmuktaà tat-paratvena nirmalaà [Cc. Madhya 19.170]. Nirmalam. We have to cleanse the desire. We have to cleanse our seeing. Now our eyes want to see some beautiful thing. Now, if we become accumstomed to see Kåñëa beautifully decorated, nicely decorated, nicely dressed, then we forget other, so-called material beauty. So the activities of the eyes, to see beautiful thing, is not changed, but it is purified. That is bhakti. Nothing has to be changed or nothing has to be stopped, but the process has to be changed. Nirbandhe kåñëa-sambandhe yukta vairägyam ucyate. We cannot be desireless. We cannot be inactive. That is also not possible. We must be active—but active for working for Kåñëa. Then it is devotional life. That is being taught in Kåñëa consciousness movement, that it is not simply negation. Simply negation will not help you. There must be some positive occupation. So we say, “Do not do this, but do this.” We say, “Do not eat meat,” but we say, “Eat Kåñëa’s nice prasädam, halavä.” So he forgets meat-eating. This is our process. We give immediately alternative. You dance. You don’t dance in the naked club; dance in the Kåñëa’s temple. The dancing is there, but is purified. In the club there are also girls are dancing and boys are dancing. Here also, girls are dancing and boys are..., but they are dancing for Kåñëa ecstasy. So nothing is stopped. This is bhakti. Kåñëa consciousness means you have to simply change your consciousness. Consciousness is there. At the present moment our consciousness is polluted. Just like water. Water is always pure. But when it is... Just like rain falls from the sky. You catch. Before touching the earth, you catch the water, it is distilled water. It is distilled water. Sometimes they catch, they hold the water. It is distilled water. You take so much time to distill water. Rain is distilled water, purified, without any contamination. But as soon as it touches this surface of the earth, it becomes muddy. Similarly, we are also... When we come from Kåñëa, we come pure, but as soon as we touch these material modes of nature, we become muddy, impure, the consciousness.  Therefore, as muddy water can be filtered, settled up and filtered and again it becomes clear, similarly, this Kåñëa consciousness movement is that however muddy you may be, by Kåñëa consciousness you will be picked up and you will come again clear, crystal like water. This is the process.
So there is nothing to change, nothing to give up. Simply it is clearing process. Sarvopädhi-vinirmuktam [Cc. Madhya 19.170]. This clearing process is we should we free from the designations. Just like these boys, American and European or Australian, Japanese, so many... We have got all kinds of students, but they are now devoid of all designations. They are not thinking that “I am American.” They are not thinking, “I am Indian.” They are thinking always, “I am Kåñëa’s servant.” This is purification. This is purification. Sarva upädhi. Upädhi. This is designation. I am not American, nor Indian. This is body. This is circumstantial. I am, ahaà brahmäsmi, and Kåñëa is Supreme Brahman, and I am Brahman, His eternal servant. This is self-realization. This is called mukti. Muktiù hitvänyathä rüpaà sva-rüpeëa avasthitiù. This is mukti. Now we are anyathä rüpam. I am thinking Even there are so many human beings here, suppose in Auckland Somebody is thinking, “I am Indian.” Somebody is thinking, “I am American.” Somebody is thinking, “I am Englishman.” So upädhi, that is upädhi. But if we give up this upädhi, designation, that “I am not this...” Just like Caitanya Mahäprabhu taught that “I am not a brähmaëa. I am not a kñatriya. I am not a vaiçya. I am not a çüdra. I am not a sannyäsé. I am not a brahmacäré.” These are all upädhi. Then what You are, Sir? Gopé-bhartuù pada-kamalayor däsa-däsänudäsaù: [Cc. Madhya 13.80] “I am the servant of the servant of the servant of Kåñëa.” This is called upädhi-less, or free from all designation. When we become free from all designation, then, in that purified state, if we engage ourself in Kåñëa activities, that is our success of life.
Thank you very much. [break]

labdhvä dravyamayém arcäà
kñity-ambv-ädiñu värcayet
äbhåtätmä muniù çänto
yata-väì mita-vanya-bhuk

labdhvä—by getting; dravya-mayém—made of physical elements; arcäm—worshipable Deity; kñiti—earth; ambu—water; ädiñu—beginning with; vä—or; arcayet—worship; äbhåta-ätmä—one who is fully self-controlled; muniù—a great personality; çäntaù—peacefully; yata-väk—controlling the force of talking; mita—frugal; vanya-bhuk—eating whatever is available in the forest.

It is possible to worship a form of the Lord made of physical elements such as earth, water, pulp, wood and metal. In the forest one can make a form with no more than earth and water and worship Him according to the above principles. A devotee who has full control over his self should be very sober and peaceful and must be satisfied simply with eating whatever fruits and vegetables are available in the forest.

It is essential for a devotee to worship the form of the Lord and not only meditate upon the form of the Lord within his mind with the chanting of the mantra given by the spiritual master. The worship of the form must be present. The impersonalist takes unnecessary trouble to meditate upon or worship something impersonal, and the path is very precarious. We are not advised to follow the impersonalist way of meditating on or worshiping the Lord. Dhruva Mahäräja was advised to worship a form made of earth and water because in the jungle, if it is not possible to have a form made of metal, wood or stone, the best process is to take earth mixed with water and make a form of the Lord and worship Him. The devotee should not be anxious about cooking food; whatever is available in the forest or in the city among the fruit and vegetable groups should be offered to the Deity, and the devotee should be satisfied eating that. He should not be anxious to have very palatable dishes. Of course, wherever it is possible, one should offer the Deities the best foodstuffs, prepared within the category of fruits and vegetables, cooked or uncooked. The important factor is that the devotee should be regulated (mita-bhuk); that is one of the good qualifications of a devotee. He should not hanker to satisfy the tongue with a particular kind of foodstuff. He should be satisfied to eat whatever prasäda is available by the grace of the Lord.

Srimad Bhagavatam  4:8:56

tasyäà viçuddha-karaëaù çiva-vär vigähya
baddhväsanaà jita-marun manasähåtäkñaù
sthüle dadhära bhagavat-pratirüpa etad
dhyäyaàs tad avyavahito vyasåjat samädhau


tasyäm—in Badarikäçrama; viçuddha—purified; karaëaù—his senses; çiva—pure; väù—water; vigähya—bathing in; baddhvä—having fixed; äsanam—sitting position; jita—controlled; marut—breathing process; manasä—by the mind; ähåta—withdrawn; akñaù—his senses; sthüle—physical; dadhära—he concentrated; bhagavat-pratirüpe—on the exact form of the Lord; etat—the mind; dhyäyan—meditating upon; tat—that; avyavahitaù—without stopping; vyasåjat—he entered; samädhau—into trance.

In Badarikäçrama Dhruva Mahäräja’s senses became completely purified because he bathed regularly in the crystal-clear purified water. He fixed his sitting position and by yogic practice controlled the breathing process and the air of life; in this way his senses were completely withdrawn. Then he concentrated his mind on the arcä-vigraha form of the Lord, which is the exact replica of the Lord and, thus meditating upon Him, entered into complete trance.

Here is a description of the añöäìga-yoga system, to which Dhruva Mahäräja was already accustomed. Añöäìga-yoga was never meant to be practiced in a fashionable city. Dhruva Mahäräja went to Badarikäçrama, and in a solitary place, alone, he practiced yoga. He concentrated his mind on the arcä-vigraha, the worshipable Deity of the Lord, which exactly represents the Supreme Lord, and thus thinking constantly of that Deity, he became absorbed in trance. Worship of the arcä-vigraha is not idol worship. The arcä-vigraha is an incarnation of the Lord in a form appreciable by a devotee. Therefore devotees engage in the temple in the service of the Lord as arcä-vigraha, a form made of sthüla (material) objects such as stone, metal, wood, jewels or paint. All of these are called sthüla, or physical representations. Since the devotees follow the regulative principles of worship, even though the Lord is there in His physical form, He is nondifferent from His original, spiritual form. Thus the devotee gets the benefit of achieving the ultimate goal of life, that is to say, becoming always absorbed in thought of the Lord. This incessant thought of the Lord, as prescribed in the Bhagavad-gétä, makes one the topmost yogé. (Srimad Bhagavatam  4:12:17)

arcye viñëau çilä-dhér guruñu nara-matir vaiñëave jäti-buddhir
viñëor vä vaiñëavänäà kali-mala-mathane päda-térthe ’mbu-buddhiù
çré-viñëor nämni mantre sakala-kaluña-he çabda-sämänya-buddhir
viñëau sarveçvareçe tad-itara-sama-dhér yasya vä näraké saù

“One who thinks the Deity in the temple to be made of wood or stone, who thinks of the spiritual master in the disciplic succession as an ordinary man, who thinks the Vaiñëava in the Acyuta-gotra to belong to a certain caste or creed or who thinks of caraëämåta or Ganges water as ordinary water is taken to be a resident of hell.” (Padma Puräëa) (Quoted Srimad Bhagavatam  4:21:12 purport.)

navasv api varñeñu bhagavän näräyaëo mahä-puruñaù puruñäëäà tad-anugrahäyätma-tattva-vyühenätmanädyäpi sannidhéyate.

navasu—in the nine; api—certainly; varñeñu—tracts of land known as varñas; bhagavän—the Supreme Personality of Godhead; näräyaëaù—Lord Viñëu; mahä-puruñaù—the Supreme Person; puruñäëäm—unto His various devotees; tat-anugrahäya—to show His mercy; ätma-tattva-vyühena—by expansions of Himself in the quadruple forms Väsudeva, Saìkarñaëa, Pradyumna and Aniruddha; ätmanä—personally; adya api—until now; sannidhéyate—is near the devotees for accepting their services.

To show mercy to His devotees in each of these nine tracts of land, the Supreme Personality of Godhead known as Näräyaëa expands Himself in His quadruple principles of Väsudeva, Saìkarñaëa, Pradyumna and Aniruddha. In this way He remains near His devotees to accept their service.

In this connection, Viçvanätha Cakravarté Öhäkura informs us that the demigods worship the Supreme Lord in His various Deity forms (arcä-vigraha) because except in the spiritual world, the Supreme Personality of Godhead cannot be directly worshiped in person. In the material world, the Lord is always worshiped as the arcä-vigraha, or Deity in the temple. There is no difference between the arcä-vigraha and the original person, and therefore those who are engaged in worshiping the Deity in the temple in full opulence, even on this planet, should be understood to be directly in touch with the Supreme Personality of Godhead without a doubt. As enjoined in the çästras, arcye viñëau çilä-dhér guruñu nara-matiù: “No one should treat the Deity in the temple as stone or metal, nor should one think that the spiritual master is an ordinary human being.” One should strictly follow this çästric injunction and worship the Deity, the Supreme Personality of Godhead, without offenses. The spiritual master is the direct representative of the Lord, and no one should consider him an ordinary human being. By avoiding offenses against the Deity and the spiritual master, one can advance in spiritual life, or Kåñëa consciousness.

Srimad Bhagavatam  5:17:14 text and  purport extract)

kñity-ädénäm ihärthänäà
chäyä na katamäpi hi
na saìghäto vikäro ’pi
na påthaì nänvito måñä

kñiti-ädénäm—of the five elements, beginning with the earth; iha—in this world; arthänäm—of those five elements; chäyä—shadow; na—neither; katamä—which of them; api—indeed; hi—certainly; na—nor; saìghätaù—combination; vikäraù—transformation; api—although; na påthak—nor separated; na anvitaù—nor inherent in; måñä—all these theories are without substance.

In this world there are five elements—namely earth, water, fire, air and ether—but the body is not a reflection of them, nor a combination or transformation of them. Because the body and its ingredients are neither distinct nor amalgamated, all such theories are insubstantial.

A forest is certainly a transformation of the earth, but one tree does not depend on another tree; if one is cut down, this does not mean that the others are cut down. Therefore, the forest is neither a combination nor a transformation of the trees. The best explanation is given by Kåñëa Himself:

mayä tatam idaà sarvaà
jagad avyakta-mürtinä
mat-sthäni sarva-bhütäni
na cähaà teñv avasthitaù

“By Me, in My unmanifested form, this entire universe is pervaded. All beings are in Me, but I am not in them.” (Bg. 9.4) Everything is an expansion of Kåñëa’s energy. As it is said, paräsya çaktir vividhaiva çrüyate: [Cc. Madhya 13.65, purport] the Lord has multi-energies, which are expressed in different ways. The energies are existing, and the Supreme Personality of Godhead also exists simultaneously; because everything is His energy, He is simultaneously one with everything and different from everything. Thus our speculative theories that ätmä, the living force, is a combination of matter, that matter is a transformation of the soul, or that the body is part of the soul are all insubstantial.

Since all the Lord’s energies are simultaneously existing, one must understand the Supreme Personality of Godhead. But although He is everything, He is not present in everything. The Lord must be worshiped in His original form as Kåñëa. He can also present Himself in any one of His various expanded energies. When we worship the Deity of the Lord in the temple, the Deity appears to be stone or wood. Now, because the Supreme Lord does not have a material body, He is not stone or wood, yet stone and wood are not different from Him. Thus by worshiping stone or wood we get no result, but when the stone and wood are represented in the Lord’s original form, by worshiping the Deity we get the desired result. This is supported by Çré Caitanya Mahäprabhu’s philosophy, acintya-bhedäbheda, which explains how the Lord can present Himself everywhere and anywhere in a form of His energy to accept service from the devotee.

Srimad Bhagavatam  7:15:59

Lord Kåñëa’s Instructions on the Process of Deity Worship
Srimad Bhagavatam 11.27 Summary

In this chapter the Supreme Personality of Godhead explains the process of kriyä-yoga, or Deity worship.

Worshiping the Deity form of the Supreme Lord automatically brings purity and satisfaction to the mind. Thus it is the source of all desirable gains. If a person has no engagement in Deity service he will simply remain attracted to material sense gratification, and he will have no hope of giving up bad association. The Personality of Godhead has given instruction, among the regulations of the Sätvata scriptures, on the process of worshiping Him as the bona fide Deity. Brahmä, Çiva, Närada, Vyäsa and all other sages have recommended this process described by the Lord as most perfectly beneficial for all the occupational classes and spiritual orders of human society, including even the women and çüdras.
There are three varieties of arcana, Deity worship, based on either the original Vedas, the secondary tantras, or a combination of these. The Deity image, the ground, the fire, the sun, the water and the heart of the worshiper are all true locations of the Deity’s presence. The Deity form to be worshiped may be constructed of any one of eight substances—stone, wood, metal, clay, paint, sand (drawn upon the ground), the mind or jewels. These categories are further subdivided into two: temporary and permanent.

The details of the worshiping process are as follows: The devotee should bathe both physically and by chanting mantras, and then he should perform the utterance of Gäyatré at the prescribed juncture of the day. He should arrange a seat facing either east or north, or else directly facing the Deity, and should bathe and clean the Deity. Then he should present clothing and ornaments, sprinkle water on the vessels and other paraphernalia to be used in the worship, and offer water for bathing the Deity’s feet, arghya, water for washing His mouth, fragrant oils, incense, lamps, flowers and food preparations. After this, one should worship the Lord’s personal servants and bodyguards, His consort energies, and the spiritual masters by chanting their respective müla-mantras. The worshiper should recite prayers from the Puräëas and other sources, offer obeisances flat on the ground, beg for benediction, and place on himself the remnants of the Lord’s garlands.
Included in this method of Deity worship are the proper installation of the transcendental Deity by constructing a fine temple, and also the conducting of processions and other festivals. By worshiping Lord Çré Hari with unconditional devotion in this manner, one gains access to pure loving service to His lotus feet. But if one steals property that has been given as charity to the Deity or the brähmaëas, whether given by himself or by others, he will have to take his next birth as a stool-eating worm.

Srimad Bhagavatam  11 canto 27th chapter summary

Don't consider that Deity is a marble statue.

Don't consider that Deity is a marble statue. No. Svayam bhagavan. Just like Caitanya Mahaprabhu. As soon as He saw Jagannatha Deity, He immediately fainted. "Oh, here is My Lord." Not like us: "Oh, here is some statue." No. It is the question of appreciation. So you appreciate or not appreciate, the Deity is the Supreme Personality of Godhead personally. We should always remember. So we shall be very careful before the Deity, not to commit offense. In serving Him, in offering Him prasadam, in dressing Him, we should always think, "Here is personally Krsna." He is personally, but due to our lack of knowledge, we cannot understand it.

(Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, Srimad-Bhagavatam 6.1.20 class excerpt, Chicago, July 4, 1975 )

"IN EVERY TOWN AND VILLAGE the chanting of the Holy Name of Krishna shall be heard. This was the forecast made by Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu almost 500 years ago in India. Today, as the Hare Krishna Mantra -- Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare -- resounds in Bombay and New York, Nairobi and Sydney, and in Paris and Hong Kong, the prophecy of Lord Caitanya stands fulfilled. The universal import of this "Samkirtan Movement" (the congregational chanting of the Holy Names of the Lord) was expressed by Lord Caitanya as follows:

"Glory to the Sri Krishna Samkirtan which cleanses the heart of all the dust accumulated for years together. Thus the fire of conditional life, of repeated birth and death, is extinguished. The Samkirtan Movement is the prime benediction for humanity at large because it spreads the rays of the benediction Moon. It is the life of all transcendental knowledge, it increases the ocean of transcendental bliss, and it helps us to have a taste of the full nectar for which we are always anxious."

(Every Town & Village, album cover)

What's So Special About Chanting Hare Krishna?
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Recently I was asked, "Don't you find it an inconvenience to always be checking to see when is the right time to do this or the best time for that?"

In simple terms my answer was and still is; if you go to the bus or railway station or airport it is probably an intelligent venture to enquire about the times and routes of vehicles than to just hope that one will be along soon, or one is going in your direction.

There are subtle influences in the Universe that for thousands of years by advanced cultures have honoured, respected and utilised. Before the corruption of the Vedik literatures by the Christian and Moslem invaders to India all these things were used; Ayurvedik Medicine; Vedik Astrology; etc. Today there's a rennaisance among many to revive these arts.

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aham kratur aham yajnah
svadhaham aham ausadham
mantro 'ham aham evajyam
aham agnir aham hutam

"But it is I who am the ritual, I the sacrifice, the offering to the ancestors, the healing herb,
the transcendental chant. I am the butter and the fire and the offering."(Lord Krishna, Bhagavad-gita 9.16)

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sattvaà rajas tama iti prakåter guëäs tair
yuktaù paraù puruña eka ihäsya dhatte
sthity-ädaye hari-viriïci-hareti saàjïäù
çreyäàsi tatra khalu sattva-tanor nåëäà syuù

sattvam—goodness; rajaù—passion; tamaù—the darkness of ignorance; iti—thus; prakåteù—of the material nature; guëäù—qualities; taiù—by them; yuktaù—associated with; paraù—transcendental; puruñaù—the personality; ekaù—one; iha asya—of this material world; dhatte—accepts; sthiti-ädaye—for the matter of creation, maintenance and destruction, etc.; hari—Viñëu, the Personality of Godhead; viriïci—Brahmä; hara—Lord Çiva; iti—thus; saàjïäù—different features; çreyäàsi—ultimate benefit; tatra—therein; khalu—of course; sattva—goodness; tanoù—form; nåëäm—of the human being; syuù—derived.

The transcendental Personality of Godhead is indirectly associated with the three modes of material nature, namely passion, goodness and ignorance, and just for the material world’s creation, maintenance and destruction He accepts the three qualitative forms of Brahmä, Viñëu and Çiva. Of these three, all human beings can derive ultimate benefit from Viñëu, the form of the quality of goodness.

That Lord Çré Kåñëa, by His plenary parts, should be rendered devotional service, as explained above, is confirmed by this statement. Lord Çré Kåñëa and all His plenary parts are viñëu-tattva, or the Lordship of Godhead. From Çré Kåñëa, the next manifestation is Baladeva. From Baladeva is Saìkarñaëa, from Saìkarñaëa is Näräyaëa, from Näräyaëa there is the second Saìkarñaëa, and from this Saìkarñaëa the Viñëu puruña-avatäras. The Viñëu or the Deity of the quality of goodness in the material world is the puruña-avatära known as Kñérodakaçäyé Viñëu or Paramätmä. Brahmä is the deity of rajas (passion), and Çiva of ignorance. They are the three departmental heads of the three qualities of this material world. Creation is made possible by the goodness of Viñëu, and when it requires to be destroyed, Lord Çiva does it by the täëòavanåtya. The materialists and the foolish human beings worship Brahmä and Çiva respectively. But the pure transcendentalists worship the form of goodness, Viñëu, in His various forms. Viñëu is manifested by His millions and billions of integrated forms and separated forms. The integrated forms are called Godhead, and the separated forms are called the living entities or the jévas. Both the jévas and Godhead have their original spiritual forms. Jévas are sometimes subjected to the control of material energy, but the Viñëu forms are always controllers of this energy. When Viñëu, the Personality of Godhead, appears in the material world, He comes to deliver the conditioned living beings who are under the material energy. Such living beings appear in the material world with intentions of being lords, and thus they become entrapped by the three modes of nature. As such, the living entities have to change their material coverings for undergoing different terms of imprisonment. The prison house of the material world is created by Brahmä under instruction of the Personality of Godhead, and at the conclusion of a kalpa the whole thing is destroyed by Çiva. But as far as maintenance of the prison house is concerned, it is done by Viñëu, as much as the state prison house is maintained by the state. Anyone, therefore, who wishes to get out of this prison house of material existence, which is full of miseries like repetition of birth, death, disease and old age, must please Lord Viñëu for such liberation. Lord Viñëu is worshiped by devotional service only, and if anyone has to continue prison life in the material world, he may ask for relative facilities for temporary relief from the different demigods like Çiva, Brahmä, Indra and Varuëa. No demigod, however, can release the imprisoned living being from the conditioned life of material existence. This can be done only by Viñëu. Therefore, the ultimate benefit may be derived from Viñëu, the Personality of Godhead.

Srimad Bhagavatam  1:2:23.

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"The religious principles taught by Mohammed and Jesus Christ are similar to the religious principles taught by Vaishnava sects. Buddhism and Jainism are similar to Saiva-dharma. This is scientific consideration of truths regarding religious principles. Those who consider their own religious principles as real dharma and others religious principles as irreligion or subreligion are unable to ascertain the truth due to being influenced by prejudice. Actually religious principles followed by people in general are different only due to the different qualifications of the practitioners, but the constitutional religious principles of all living entities are one." (Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakur. Sri Krsna Samhita.)

updated 21st July 2003

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Reforms, in the name of Krishna

Syed Firdaus Ashraf in Mumbai | December 23, 2003 05:24 IST

They were unclean, unshaven, appeared tired and ill-fed. All of them have a common friend that is a 20-feet high wall, which surrounds and cuts them off from the rest of the world.

No wonder than that over 500 inmates of Arthur Road Jail turned up on Monday morning for an hour-long meditation course organised by International Society for Krishna Consciousness with the help of Anagha Charitable Trust. The jail in south Mumbai was reverberating to the chants of Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna.

"It gives me a great feeling," said Hariram Jaiswal who is accused of murdering his friend and is an undertrial (a court is seized of his case). "I never participated in such programmes so far. But after spending three months in jail, I feel this (the meditation course) is the best thing that has happened to me ever," he said.

Shailendra Tripathi, another murder accused, said, "So far, I did not know the meaning of Bhagwad Gita. But now I know the importance of the Gita in my life and more important, my religion, of which I had no clue till date."

The organisers had set up a stage and loudspeakers that spewed slogans praising Lord Krishna while some ISKCON members explained the meaning of the Gita to the inmates.

ISKCON organises such functions for jail inmates across India in 23 states every year in the month of December.

"We have found that these kind of programmes help prisoners realise their mistakes. The quality of their life improves if they continue to follow the teachings of the Gita," says Amit Vyas, a trustee of Anagha Charitable Trust, which had arranged for distribution of copies of the book free of cost to the inmates.

R N Parde, Deputy Superintendent of Arthur Road jail, says, "We want more and more inmates to know about religion and God. It will help them to lead a more decent life after they are released from jail."

The impact of the event on the inmates could be gauged from their reaction when one of the organiser took to the stage and announced the distribution of copies of the Bhagwad Gita in various languages.

There was a clamour and inmates could be heard saying: "Please pass on a Marathi Bhagwad Gita."

"For me a Gujarati," shouted another.

Bhim Das, president of the Hare Krishna Temple in Juhu, explained, "The common man feels more attached to the Gita when he reads it in his mother tongue."

Asked if there was any lasting impact on the lives of the prison inmates, Vyas says, "There are many examples of jail inmates reforming after participating in our programmes. Two years ago, we held a programme in Nashik Jail. One of the inmates was so moved by the teachings in the Gita that he dedicated two years of his life, after his release, to our trust and went on to become a life member."
Concludes Parde, "We are just trying to build a better future for the inmates. A drug addict won't give up his addiction overnight. But he may change his viewpoint or his habits if he attends such programmes. We encourage such events hoping the inmates will continue to follow the good path after their release from here."

US Vegetarians Hesitiate to Capitalize on Mad Cow Case

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA, January 1, 2004: Droves of Britons gave up meat during England's mad cow outbreak in the 1980s, but since the discovery of an infected cow in Washington state American vegetarians mostly have trod carefully, trying not to take advantage of a situation that could cost lives and cripple a $40 billion industry. "I caution vegetarians from using mad cow disease as a recruiting tool," said Joseph Connelly, editor of San Francisco-based VegNews magazine. "Mad cow disease is not a good thing no matter how you look at it." Though vegetarian headcounts are imprecise, Britain's meat-free population surged following its bout with mad cow, which killed 143 people, according to Tina Fox, spokeswoman for the Vegetarian Society of the United Kingdom. She estimates up to 10 percent of the population is vegetarian, and up to 40 percent has reduced its meat consumption.

Vegetarian businesses and advocacy groups mostly say the discovery of mad cow in the United States still is too isolated to prompt people to change their diets. "We're not really at that stage," said Charles Stahler, co-director of the Baltimore-based Vegetarian Resource Group. "They haven't shown that anyone is sick, so it's really very different here." For now, the discovery of one sick cow mostly will steel the minds of existing vegetarians.

"It's giving them another good reason to stay firm in their beliefs," said Carla Davis, managing editor of Glen Allen, Va.-based Vegetarian Times magazine, which has a monthly circulation of 300,000. Vegetarianism has been on an upswing in the United States. Vegetarian Resource Group estimates there are roughly 5.7 million adult vegetarians, up from about 2 million a decade ago.

Natural foods grocers, including giants Whole Foods Market and Wild Oats, said sales data aren't in yet, but so far shopping habits don't appear to have changed. "I've seen nobody coming in panicking, saying 'I have to become a vegetarian,"' said John Hutchins, manager of the Concord Food Co-Op in Concord, N.H. "But if this keeps going I wouldn't doubt if more people start experimenting."

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals group already has activists around the country distributing information about vegetarianism outside restaurants and launched a new ad campaign: "You would have to be MAD to eat meat." Bruce Friedrich, the group's spokesman, said demand for PETA's free vegetarian starter kits -- a pamphlet of recipes and advice for changing one's diet -- has been so strong the group called in employees from vacation to handle the requests -- 10,000, up from the usual 4,000. "The USDA and the meat industry are playing Russian roulette with the health of the American people, and the national consciousness is being awakened" he said.

Courtesy of

Mad Cow Disease found in USA:,0,6747920,print.story?coll=nyc-topnews-short-navigation

Beef industry's dirty little secret: Feeding public downer cows:

Report: Hundreds of thousands in US may be dying of undiagnosed mad cow disease:

USDA refuses to release mad cow records to media:

Mad Cow/CJD - Staggering List Of Products Made From Cattle


The inevitable has happened—a case of Mad Cow disease in the U.S. Though Britain and Japan have already experienced this devastating issue, we Americans are grappling with how to deal with this, while our government is trying to put just the right spin on it.

My local paper ran an excellent wire story the other day titled “Mad Cow is least of food problems.” While Mad Cow is not to be minimized, the statistics about other food-borne illnesses are underreported: each year, 76 million people get sick, 325,000 are hospitalized, and 5,000 die in the U.S. alone from food-borne illness.

While a percentage of these illnesses are from improperly washed produce, or produce that has been contaminated, a lion’s share of these illnesses are caused by meat. Poultry, which is perceived to be “healthier” than red meat, causes 2 million illnesses per year just from one bacteria, campylobacter. Eggs and seafood can be culprits, too. Salmonella, e coli, and listera are other pathogens that cause much illness.

Going back to the teens who write to me, many tell me that their parents feel that not eating meat is “risky.” It seems to me that just the opposite is true. If my kids wanted to eat meat, I’d really be nervous! I'm glad that this is not even a remote possibility.

I think it’s best to go vegetarian on the basis of conviction rather than reaction, but if ever there was a time to consider the possibility due to unsettling statistics, this would be it!

See more on Vegetarianism HERE

Articles from Back to Godhead Magazine:

Amala Bhakta dasa reciting Srimad Bhagavatam on-line:

sa itthaà bhakti-yogena
tapo-yuktena pärthivaù
sva-dharmeëa harià préëan
sarvän kämän çanair jahau

saù—he (Ambaréña Mahäräja); ittham—in this way; bhakti-yogena—by performing transcendental loving service to the Lord; tapaù-yuktena—which is simultaneously the best process of austerity; pärthivaù—the King; sva-dharmeëa—by his constitutional activities; harim—unto the Supreme Lord; préëan—satisfying; sarvän—all varieties of; kämän—material desires; çanaiù—gradually; jahau—gave up.

The king of this planet, Mahäräja Ambaréña, thus performed devotional service to the Lord and in this endeavor practiced severe austerity. Always satisfying the Supreme Personality of Godhead by his constitutional activities, he gradually gave up all material desires.

Severe austerities in the practice of devotional service are of many varieties. For example, in worshiping the Deity in the temple there are certainly laborious activities. Çré-vigrahärädhana-nitya-nänä çåìgära-tan-mandira-märjanädau **. One must decorate the Deity, cleanse the temple, bring water from the Ganges and Yamunä, continue the routine work, perform ärati many times, prepare first-class food for the Deity, prepare dresses and so on. In this way, one must constantly be engaged in various activities, and the hard labor involved is certainly an austerity. Similarly, the hard labor involved in preaching, preparing literature, preaching to atheistic men and distributing literature door to door is of course an austerity (tapo-yuktena). Tapo divyaà putrakä [SB 5.5.1]. Such austerity is necessary. Yena sattvaà çuddhyet. By such austerity in devotional service, one is purified of material existence (kämän çanair jahau). Indeed, such austerity leads one to the constitutional position of devotional service. In this way one can give up material desires, and as soon as one is freed from material desires, he is free from the repetition of birth and death, old age and disease.

Srimad Bhagavatam  9:4:26

Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, 8th June 1975. Srimad Bhagavatam  6:1:6. Honolulu, Hawaii.

So only bhakti-märga is not risky. Bhakti-märga means the devotional..., path of devotional service. Because this material life means contamination of the three modes of material nature. Either you are on the goodness or in the passion or in ignorance, there is chance of falling down from one platform to another, so long you are on the material platform. But if you remain on the spiritual platform... Just like we are trying to keep you on the spiritual platform. That is bhakti-yoga—always engaged in devotional service. Then you are above all these material qualities.
That is confirmed in the Bhagavad-gétä:

mäà ca vyabhicäriëi
bhakti-yogena yaù sevate
sa guëän samatétyaitän
brahma-bhüyäya kalpate
 [Bg. 14.26]

Anyone who is fully, constantly, twenty-four hours engaged, avyabhicäriëi... Avyabhicäriëi, without any stoppage. Therefore I want that in our temple there should be program that we are always engaged in devotional service, twenty-four hours. But because we have got this material body we require a little rest, the minimum rest, as minimum as possible. Because the sleeping means waste of time. We are supposed to be engaged twenty-four hours in the service of the Lord, but as it is not possible, we have to sleep, take little rest, so that should be the minimum. Because the whole period sleeping means waste. So all these Gosvämés, they used to sleep not more than two hours. That was also not possible in some day. They were so busy in writing books and other...
    So this should be minimized, and we should be engaged twenty-four hours. If we remain engaged in that way... We have got so many engagement. We are daily singing—I do not know whether you understand the meaning — çré-vigrahärädhana-nitya-nänä-çåìgära-ta n-mandira märjanädau, yuktasya bhaktäàç ca niyuïjato ’pi vande guroù çré-caraëäravindam **. We have got çré-vigraha. The çré-vigraha-sevä—all rising early in the morning, arrange for maìgala äratrik, then dressing, then offering food, then äratrik, so many hours. The whole day can be used in that way. Then reading books, class, taking care of the temple. Tan-mandira-märjanädau. Don’t think that if one is engaged in the Deity worship and if one is engaged in the gardening work there is distinction. No. The one who is working as a gardener, he is as good as the one who is dressing the Deity, because it is Absolute plane. There is no difference between... Just like in the material world, if one is working as manager and the other is working as menial servant, there is difference of pay or difference of service. No. In the spiritual world there is no such thing. In the spiritual world even a small ant who is serving Kåñëa by chance... Suppose if there is an ant and the flower is thrown into the lotus feet of Kåñëa and the ant kisses the lotus feet of Kåñëa, he is as good as the püjäré. This is spiritual world. So we should give everyone chance how to serve Kåñëa. Then he will remain on the upper platform. Samatétya. Atétya mean transcending. Etan guëän. Etan guëän means because the material world is complicated with the modes of material nature, so this is called guëa. So anyone who is engaged constantly in devotional service, sa guëän samatétyaitän [Bg. 14.26], he immediately transcends the influence of the material qualities. Sa guëän samatétya etän brahma-bhüyäya kalpate.
So these things will be discussed, that “Such person is no meant for going to the hell.” No. They are not meant. It is stated that such devotees, they will not in dream also see what is hellish condition of life. They are so, mean, guaranteed. So this hellish condition of life is meant for the persons who are rotting in these material modes of nature, and if you remain above the influence of material nature, always being engaged in devotional service... We have got varieties of service, and we have got such program. So if, some way or other, if we remain engaged always in devotional service, then there is no question of downfall or going to the hellish condition of life.
Thank you very much. (end)


Three modes of worship


There was one mendicant.  He had no pot to drink water.  He had nothing.  He was just walking around barefoot with only his hands.  He had no place to live.  So he went to aa pot maker, and he begged repeatedly, "Please give me a pot.  I will use it for various purposed, so please give me."  After 10 months of begging, the pot maker made him a pot and gave it to him.  The mendicant took the pot, and he was looking at it, "I got a pot!  I got a pot!"  And he was dancing this way and that.  But when he threw the pot up into the air in joy, he forgot to catch it.

MORAL:  This is an expression in South India - a beggar begged for a pot for 10 months, and when he got it he just played with it and broke it.  This body is a pot.  We beg for 10 months, and then we get the pot.  Pregnancy lasts 9 months, and then in the 10th month we come out.  But then when we get the pot - "Oh I've got a pot!  I've got a pot!"  And we engage in sense gratification and then "Phut!"  And then one gets another pot.


This story is called Phuraphai govindaya namah.  Phuraphai means "puffed rice."  Once there was a man who was carrying grains, puffed rice, on his head.  He encountered a big gust of wind that carried away all of his grains, and then the man exclaimed, "Govinda Bhog!" (An offering unto Govinda).  Because the grains had been taken away by God, he considered it as his share of devotional service that he had given something to him.


An insensitive worshipper of the goddess Kali went to the temple and prayed to the goddess in a materialistic way, typical of a demigod worshipper.  He asked for a material benediction.  After his prayers and a perfunctory puja, he soon got the desired result.  But his puja included an obligation that when he got the desired result he would offer the goddess a sacrifice of a goat.  After some days passed, the goddess in the temple spoke to the worshipper and asked him, "Where is the goat you promised?"  "It is very expensive," he said, "and I don't think I can afford to feed you a goat."  "All right," said the goddess, " but you have to offer something.  So go and offer me at least a pig."  The worshipper went away but neglected the goddess's request.  Then on another occasion in the temple the goddess spoke to him again and said, "Where is the offering of a pig?"  This time the devotee again excused himself and said, "I am sorry, but I could not find any pigs anywhere.  It is not so easy."  The goddess replied, "This is not very good.  You have received your benediction, and now you must give something in return.  But just to make it easy for you, I request that you at least offer something that is available for you.  So why don't you at least offer me a fly?  "But goddess," said the worthless worshipper, "there are so many flies buzzing around you.  Can't you just grab one yourself?"

MORAL:  Demigod worship does not involve any love whatsoever.  This type of worship is very selfish, and one only has his own interests at heart.

please visit our Parables page

Some Official web-sites of senior Iskcon devotees:
H.H. Bir-Krishna Goswami's site

HH Trivikram Swami

HH Indradyumna Swami

HH Jayapataka Swami

HH Prahladananda Swami

HH Bhakti Tirtha Swami

HH Prabhavishnu Swami

HH Devamrita Swami

HH Suhotra Swami

HG Vaiyasaki dasa Adhikari

HG Prithu Prabhu:

HH Kadamba Kanana Swami

If you know of any other senior Iskcon devotee web-sites please send their URL to us to share with others through this media

Here's a short list with some links - sadhu sanga ki jaya


The Peace Formula

The Real Peace Formula

See more on Yoga and Meditation HERE:

What's Going On Where & Adds


Official Opening of the New Iskcon Auckland temple

16th - 17th - 18th January 2004

for more information see our page:

Holy Cow Mania pages:

Hare Krishna School & Playgroup

Krishna Conscious education for children

Hare Krishna School in Riverhead, Auckland is a government funded school that runs from 9am – 3pm five days a week. We cover all core subjects in the New Zealand Curriculum and in addition teach Sanskrit, Sastra and Vedic arts. Children who come to this school get everything that children at state schools get plus Vedic culture and values in a serene rural environment.

We also run a preschool program for children 3 and up.

A school bus service provides transport from Auckland suburbs.

For enrolment information please contact:-

Ph: 09-412-6325
Mob: 021-265-7587
Fax: 09-412-6325
Find out what the NZ Government Education Review Office thinks of the Hare Krishna School. Click the link below.$File/4204.htm?OpenElement

Balgopal Krishna Conscious Preschool in Henderson Auckland prepares children for school with a nurturing academic and character development program founded on Krishna consciousness.

 For details please contact-

Vishnupadi dasi Ph.836-1214

Detail schedule: Mayapur festival - 2004

19th FEB -
Devotees arrival

20th FEB    -
Festival Inauguration Day
4.15 am  - Mangal Arotic
6.15 am  - Sb. Class
7.00 am  - Deities greeting
8.00 am  - Dhwaja Arohanm ( Raising Garuda Flags)
9.00 am  - Prasad
10.00 am  - Deity report by GBCs
2.30 pm  - Prasad
6.00 pm - Evening arati
7.00 pm  - Festival Inauguration
Vedic mantra path and lighting the lamp
Welcome address
GBC Chairman coronation
GBC Chairman Address
Address by Festival co ordinator
Address by Mayapur Director
Vote of thanks
Drama by Vaikuntha Players
Nama Yajna Adhivas

21st FEB -
Panchatattva Deities installation Adhivas Day
4.15 am  - Mangal Arati
6.00 am  - Harinam Sankirtan (Akhanda Hari nam)  Starts in Pancha Tattav temple
7.00 am  - Deities greeting
8.00 am  - SB. Class at the pandal
9.00 am  - Breakfast Prasad
10.00 am -  Jal Yatra ( All devotees will go with procession to bring water from Ganga )
2.30 pm - Prasad
4.30 pm  - Fire sacrifice  in Pancha Tattav temple ( For donors to participate)
Astottara asta Kundiya yajna (108 Kunda fire sacrifice to celebrate Srila Prabhupada 108 birth anniversary)
 7.00 pm  - Deities installation  Adhivas
8.00 pm - Drama by Vaikuntha players
Whole day Hari nam in temple

22nd FEB : -
Srila Prabhupada Maha Abhishek Day
4.15 am  - Mangal Arati
7.00 am  - Deities greeting
8.00 am  - SB. Class
9.00 am - Prasad
10 am - Maha abhishek of Srila Prabhupada at Puspa Samadhi with 108 tirtha water.
2.30 pm - Prasad
4.30pm - Tattva Nyasa Homa for Pancha deities
Whole day Harinam in temple

23rd FEB :  - The Panchatattva deities instalation day.
6.15 am Srimad Bhagavatam Class
7.00 am - Deities greeting
8.00 am - Abhishek starts
10.45 am - Abhishek ends , Cleaning deities rooms
11.45 am  - Prana pratistha
12.30 noon  - Bhoga Offering
 1.00 pm  - Maha Arati
2.00  pm - Prasad
6.15 pm  - First Maha evening Arati
7.00 pm  - Cultural program

24th Feb : -
Parikrama leaves Mayapur
1st March :  -
Parikrama Returns to Mayapur
1.0       pm - Parikrama returns to Mayapur
2.30 pm - Prasad
4.30 pm  - Boat festival , Swing festival
6.00 pm  - Evening Arati
7.00pm - Cultural Program

2nd March : ( Ekadashi)
Book distribution awards day
4.15am  - Mangal Arati
7.00am  - Darshan Arati
8.00am  - Bhg. Class
9.00 am - Prasad
10.00am - Seminars
2.30 pm Prasad
4.00 pm - Seminars
5.00 pm  - Boat festival
6.00 pm  - Stage Program starts
6.30 pm - Book Distribution awards distribution
8.00 pm - Cultural programs

3rd March : -
Santipur festival Day
4.15 am  - Mangal Arati
6.00 am  - Devotees will leave for Santipur
9.00 am  - Breakfast prasad
3.00 pm  - Lunch Prasad
4.00 pm - Seminars
6.00 pm  - Congregational preaching awards distribution
7.30 pm  - Cultural programs

4thMarch :
4.15 am  - Mangal Arati
7.00 am - Greeting deities
8.00 am  - Bhagavatam Class
9.00 am  - Prasad
10.00 am - Seminars
2.30 pm  - Prasad
4.00 pm  - Seminars
6.00 pm  - World excellency  awards distribution
7.30 pm  - Cultural programs

5th March : -
Ratha Yatra Day
4.15 am - Mangal Arati
7.00 am  -Greeting the deities
8.00 am  - Bhagavatam Class
9.00 am Prasadm
10.00 am  -Ratha Yatra
2.30 pm Prasad
4.00 pm Seminar
6.30 pm  - Cultural program

6th March -
Gaura Purnima Day
4.15 am  - Mangal Arati
7.00 am - Greeting the deities
8.00 am - Bhagavatam Class
11.00 am  - Initiation Ceremony
4.00 pm  - Gauranga maha Abhishek
7.30 pm  - Anukulpa Prasad

7th March -
Jagannath Mishra's Utsav
4.15 am -  Mangal Arati
7.00 am - Greeting the deities
8.00 am - Bhagavatam Class
9.00 am Prasad
2.30 am  - Maha Feast

End of the Mayapur Festival  - 2004

*Some small changes to the schedule are possible

Gaura Yoga Centre
First floor
175, Vivian Street,

Phone:  (04) 801-5500

Learn about the Krishna conscious life-style
Learn Yoga
Learn about Vegetarianism
...all in a non-threatening friendly atmosphere.

Contact us:

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A spiritual program for the modern age.

Every Wednesday
7.30 p.m. - 8:30pm

only on

783 A.M.
Presently the Hari Vandana service is in need of good quality Krishna conscious music (CDs audio tapes etc) to help with programs, if you have any or would like to help in any way please contact Jagjeevan prabhu HERE:

or for more information

ISKCON Wellington

Sunday Love Feasts - contact your local temple, or community for details

Harinaam Kirtan and Bhajans in Tauranga BOP.
Every Saturday in the Red Square by the Strand (or Mt. Maunganui)

Come and join the throng 11:00 am - 12:30 pm

...for more details contact Trivikrama dasa or Chaitanya Nitai dasa (for Trivikram prabhu) (for Chaitanya Nitai prabhu)

Vegetarian Clubs
Waikato University - Hamilton campus

2 days per week serving about 100 plates each day.

for more information

Auckland Veda club.
Auckland University - Wellesley St. campus

Its a simple weekly program thats been running for a few years, at Clubspace,
where we have a vegetarian prasadam lunch and sometimes show a video.
Srila Prabhupada's books are available to browse or buy.

For more information contact Auckland temple:

Otago University - Dunedin - Vege Club
Room 2., Clubs & Societies Building
Albany St.,

contact Jambavati dasi (03) 477 8277



See more about Food For Life and how you can help HERE:

Food For Life - Auckland
Monday to Friday  11:00am to 8:00pm
Saturday  11:00am to 3:00pm

Catering for students, shoppers, office workers, and the needy - all will find full satisfaction for the body, mind and soul.

Saturday Evenings at “Food for Life” from 4.00pm to 6.00pm.
Come along to join in an evening of Chanting,
Philosophy and a Vegetarian Dinner.

On alternate Monday nights H.H. Mukunda Goswami will be present to speak and answer your questions.

Phone Food for Life, 268 Karangahape Road (K-rd), Auckland, for more information, (09) 300 7585

Higher Taste
Amazing Vegetarian Cuisine At Down to Earth Prices!

Organic Fruit Juices
Delicious Curries
$ 5.95
$ 7.95
$ 9.95

City: ABC Shoreline, 98-104 Victoria Street, Wellington.

Gaura's Place
Gaura's Place is at 555 Victoria street, first floor, Hamilton Central.

Ph (07) 839 3558

We are open Weekdays 11:30am -2:00pm for lunch which is a set menu daily,
with varying preps available of a balanced; Soup, Rice, Curried Vegetables, Puris or Pakoras, Salad and Sweet Halava.

Lunches 11.30 - 2 pm Weekdays.  Prices, $7.50 waged, $6 unwaged, 3 course lunch.
Dinner Fridays 7 - 9 pm, $15 ea, 3 courses. $5 kids under 12 years.

Bhagavad Gita classes Friday nights 6.30 - 8pm, $7 includes dinner.

This meal is also "set" although there is more variety and more "gourmet" style.

There are yoga classes (Iyengar style) on Thursday nights 6:30-7:45pm and Saturday mornings 10:15am -11:30am.
Cost $15 waged, $12 unwaged price includes dinner or lunch.

Friday nights we explore the Bhagavad Gita from 6.30 pm, followed by dinner at 8pm, culminating with a mantra meditaion.
Cost is $7 includes dinner.

Weekends- CLOSED.

Run by Jhulan yatra dasa and Rasa yatra devi dasi

Gauranga's in Tauranga
174, Devonport Road Tauranga
phone  (07) 579 4720

Sunday evening program 5pm
Wednesday evening program

What is Bhakti Yoga?
Learn how to practice Krishna Consciousness at home
Bhagavad Gita class, and discussion
The science of self realization
How to practically make spiritual progress by chanting of the Hare Krishna mantra
Learn about the wonders of Krishna prasadam

.....and much more !!!

in a nice friendy family atmosphere.

Business + F.H. for Sale
50-seater restaurant.
Established for four years
Run by devotees
Operating hours 10.30-3PM

Full financials available
Business and Free hold $170,000

Contact: Tracey and Julian
+61 07 4093 8483 (café),
+ 6107 4093 9569
mobile: 042 572 5901

See their page for pictures

Successful Prasadam business for sale

We would like $15,000 for it. It has a current health licence.
We originally had it on the market for $17000.

Includes all chattles

Zephyr 18’6 Caravan
1  Vee ray / GT45 twin vat
1  Baine marie
1  Food processor
1  Chest freezer
1  Fridge freezer
1  Large fridge (large vege drawer)
Gas calafont hot water system with 2 sinks
2  29kg gas bottles
1  New gas changover valve
1  Double chip shuttle
1  Chip scoop
2  Chip baskets
2  20 litre water bottles
1  45 litre water bottle
1  Small fridge
1  2 ring gas burner
1  Mesh scoop
2  Tongs 
Plastic buckets
1  Serviette holder
2  Stainless steel fork and spoon holders
2  white boards
1  A frame sign board
1  Large chalk board
1  Radio
Misc bags , chip cups , meal containers
Spoons , forks
1  Fire extinguisher
1  fire blanket
1  Car battery
Long power lead
Some serving utensils
2  Large bins
1  Oil tin 
1  Rice cooker
1 awning

All enquiries - inquiries

ph: (06) 379 6579
mobile - cell 025 862 237

Practicing Krishna Consciousness at Home:

East Meets West @ "The Loft"
Enjoy an enlightening time associating with energetic devotees. Explore the similarities of ancient and modern surroundings through Krishna consciousness in a friendly non-threatening atmosphere.

Wellington Loft (Gaura Yoga centre)

Gaura's Place - Hamilton:

Christchurch Loft
Hanuman dasa:

Gauranga's in Tauranga
For more information:

Sydney Temple (Aus) Shop On-line:

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more options in the marketplace HERE:

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Australian yatra: (...across the ditch )

...the site for Shaligram, Govardhan, Dwaraka and Tadiya shilas and Their Sevaks
Why not come on in for Cyber-darshan

There's so many new participants (GBCs, Gurus, Sannyasis, et al), new incredible pic's, capturing and enlivening articles and stories, pilgrimage diaries - check it out - believe me you won't be disappointed.

Thousands of Salagrams, Govardhan, Dwarka shilas from ALL over the world.

READ Salagram kosha on-line.......
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last updated 10th December 2003

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Prasadam Recipes

Download your FREE  Cake Recipe Cookbook
 - with 100 EGGLESS recipes


Ekadasi Book Cooking - new book coming:

Ekadasi Recipes - preps without grains or beans etc:

Vrata ka khaana - Fast Foods cook book 4 sale (all ekadasi preps - some samples here):

Fast Food of a Different Kind:

EgglessDotCom - A site for vegetarian baking without eggs.

Non-vegetarian aditives and non-ekadasi food aditives list:

Meat Free Zone:

A Guide to Gourmet Vegetarian Cooking and a Karma-Free Diet:


(even Parmesan and other favorites)

(we bought some Stilton, Parmesan, Edam, Swiss and a few others - LOL - you have to check out these pages and then go to your Woolworths, Countdown, Pak'nSav, New World or local Deli.....believe me it's worth it - =>:-))) updated to help you

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Allow the Meatrix to download fully before attempting to observe.............

These recipes are specifically used in the Brahma-Madhwa Vaishnava community for shaaka haara vrata - first month of Chaturmasya where one fasts from Greem leafy vegetables - spinach:

Sabhudana 1/2 Kg.
Curry leaves 4 leaves
Green Chillies 3 to 4 finely chopped
Coriander leaves for garnish
Peanuts 50 gms. (Powder)
Lemon Juice 1
Black pepper powder 1 Tsp.
Salt to taste
Oil for Frying
Pototes _ 4 big size (boiled & mashed)

Wash Sabudana and soak in water for one hour. Drain for one hour. In a bowl add sabudana and add all the ingredients. Make a dough. Make small balls from the dough. Deep Fry.

For Chutney (Coconut) :
Ingredients :
Green Chillies 6 - 7
Coconut 1
Green corriander 1/2 bunch
Cumin seed 1 Tsp.
Lemon Juice 2
Add salt to taste

In a mixer add chopped coconut & all the other Ingredients. Transfer it in a bowl.

For Teadka :
In a small pan add 1 tsp oil & then add 1 tsp mustard seeds, when mustard seeds began to crackle add 2 to 3 curry leaves, then garnish this tadka over chutney.

Ingredients :
Singara Flour 1 Cup
Boiled smashed potatoes 1/2 kg.
Green Chillies 2 to 3 finely chopped
Salt to taste
Corriender leaves
White Pepper Powder 1 Tsp.

In a bowl add all these ingredients & mix well. Make round balls from this. Stuffing & shallow fry it till Golden colour. Serve it with tamarind chutney. Soak a Tamarind in Lukewarm water for about 30 mins. & then force through a strainer. Now in a same pan add this tamarind water when the boil comes add 200 gms sugar or Jaggerry & stir well for about 30 mins or till it become thick.

For Paste:
In a bowl add singara 1/2 kg. add 1 tsp oil & water & make soft dough. Make small balls & make poori through poori maker & deep fry it till Golden brown.

Curd Potatoes
Ingredient :
Curd 1 Cup
Potatoes 1/2 kg.
Green Chillies 2 to 3 finely chopped
Cumin seed 1 tsp.
Mustard seed 1 tsp.
curry leaves 2 to 3
Green Corriender For Garnishing
Kasturi Methi 1 tsp.
Salt to taste
Cumin Powder 1 tsp.
White Pepper Powder 1 tsp.
Ghee 2 Tbsp
Turmeric Powder 1 tsp.

Boil potatoes & cut with knife into small pieces. In a pan add ghee then add curry leaves, cumin seed, Mustard seeds, chopped Green Chillies, then add beated curd, when boil comes. Add turmeric powder, white pepper powder, Cumin powder, Kasturi Methi then add potatoes. Keep in slow flame for about 5 to 7 mins. then add 1/2 cup water & again keep it for 5 mins. in slow flame & in the end add salt. Transfer in a bowl & garnish with green corriander leaves. Serve with Singara Poori.

Ingredients :
Pumpkin 1/2 kg finely chopped
Singara Flour 1 cup
Green Chillies 1 tbsp finely chopped
Cumin Powder 1 tsp
Salt to taste
Oil for Frying

In a bowl add Pumpkin & in that add all the ingredients & mix well. Now take oil in a pan & deep fry it. Serve with Tamarind chutney.

Ingredients :
Khoya 300 gms.
Chhenna 50 gms.
Sugar 4 1/2 cups
Flour 40 gms.
A pinch of soda bi-carbonate
Green Cardomom 10
Pistachio 4 tsp
Saffron 2 tsp
Rose water 2 drops
Ghee to deep fry.
Knead gently khoya. Crumble the Chhenna & knead gently.

The syrup : Boil sugar with water to make a syrup of one string consistency & keep warm. Dissolve soda Bi-carbonate in a tablespoon of water.
For the Gulab Jamun: Mix Chhenna with khoya, add flour & the dissolved soda bi-carbonate, knead gently. Reserve 50 gms., for the filling & make 20-24 balls of 1 inch diameter with remaining mixture.

The Filling : Pear Cordomom & Discard the skin. Blanch Pistachio cool & remove the skin & cut into slivers, pound saffron with a pestle to break the flakes. Add Cardomom seeds, pistachio Sliver saffron flakes & rose water concentrate to the reserved mixture & mix well

. For stuffing : Flatten the balls, place a portion of the filling in the middle, seal & make smooth balls. Cooking : Heat ghee in a Kadhai add the balls & deep fry over medium heat until golden brown. Remove & Immerse immediately in the syrup.
To serve : Remove to a glass bowl along with the syrup. Serve Hot.

Ingredients :
Sweet Potato 1/2 Kg.
Sugar 100 gms.
Ghee 150 gms.
Green Cardamom Powder 1 Tsp.
Boiled Almonds 50 gms. (Soaked in hot water)

Boil the Sweet Potatoes in pressure cooker for about 10 mins. In a Kadhai add Ghee, then add mashed Sweet Potaoes & stir for 10 mins. in slow flame. Then after 10 mins. add sugar. Keep on stirring for 5 mins. Halwa is Ready. Transfer it in a bowl & garnish with green Cardamom powder & chopped almonds.

1 cup (125 Gms) Khoya, crumbled
1/4 cup (25 Gms) Arrowroot
1/2 cup (120 ml.) Milk
1/4 tea spoon Elaichhi (cardamom) powdered
Ghee (clarified butter) for pan frying
1 cup (240 Gms) Sugar
1/2 cup (120 ml) Water
Almonds, blanched and shredded, for garnishing

Blend khoya and arrowroot together, add elaichi and kali mirch.Mix in milk, little at a time, enough to form a thick batter of dropping consistency
In a board pan, dissolve sugar over low flame in the water, stirring continuously but not letting it come to a boil.
Once dissolved, increase flame and let the syrup cook till a drop on the thumb, pressed with a finger and pulled apart forms a 'thread'. If not, dilute and cook some more. Keep warm.
Heat a thick layer of ghee, drop equivalent to a tablespoon of the batter into it, lower flame and cook till light brown on both sides. Lift out of the pan and drop into the sugar syrup.
Repeat above step till all the batter us used up. Lift out the maalpuas from the sugar syrup and transfer to serving dish. Serve hot garnished with almonds.

1 cup whipping cream
1 cup yogurt (plain)
2/3 cup sugar
Juice from 1 lemon
A drop of yellow food colouring
1 1/2 teaspoon grated lemon peel

In bowl combine whipping cream & sugar. Whip with mixer on on high speed until cream is stiff. Fold in lemon juice, yogurt, and lemon peel. Add coloring at this time if desired. Put in freezer. Stir every 45 minutes until frozen (about 5 hours)

Vege update:
Social scientists and law enforcement officials have identified animal abuse as a symptom of emotional illness and a precursor to violent crimes against human beings. To allow individuals guilty of perpetrating such cruel acts to go unpunished or not sufficiently punished would be to sanction these horrific crimes and would permit them to go on to possibly commit violent crimes against humans.

The Animal Spirit Newsletter - Issue #2 -  4/21/03-4/27/03

Higher Taste cook book

OVER 100 EGGLESS CAKE recipes can be found on our Main index and
on many other pages at:

Visit our Award winning site - Vegetarianism & Beyond
Interesting articles - information - history - arguments - links............ (been re-vamped) fact everything you want to know about Vegetarianism and Beyond:
... last updated 20th November 2003

Offering our food to Krishna:
....excerpt from lecture by HDG Srila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada - Srimad-Bhagavatam 1.3.1-3 -- San Francisco, March 28, 1968

The Vedic literature says like this, that God has no leg, no hand. Therefore the impersonalists take advantage of it. "Oh, here it is stated God has no legs, no hands." But the next line is, javana grhita: "He can accept everything which you offer Him in devotion."

Now how He can accept? If He has no hand, how He can accept things from us? That means He hasn't got a hand like us. His hand is different. Therefore even though He is situated in the spiritual world, which is far, far away from us, still, He says in the Bhagavad-gita, it is said,

patram puspam phalam toyam
yo me bhaktya prayacchati
tad aham bhakty-upahrtam
asnami prayatatmanah

Krsna says that "A little flower or little water or a little leaf, whatever My devotee offers Me in love and devotion, I accept it." And tad aham bhakty-upahrtam. "And because he has brought it with great devotion, therefore I eat." Tad aham bhakty-upahrtam asnami. Asnami means "I eat." Now you can say, "All right, I'll offer these fruits and flower to God, but it is the same. It is remaining. How He is eating?" But His eating is not like my eating, because He hasn't got a body like this. This body is material. If you bring me a plate of fruits, this body immediately swallows it. But He has got spiritual body. He eats... Simply as soon as He knows that you have offered it in devotion, He eats immediately.

Go here to follow the simple system for offering foodstuffs to the Lord
... and always with the Magic ingredient - Offer it to Krishna.....
... with L'n D (love and devotion)

Nutrition and Health - vitamins, a balanced diet, through prasadam:

Vegetarian Update - newsletter from NZ Vegetarian Socity in Wellington:

“If anyone wants to save the planet, all they have to do is just stop eating meat.
That’s the single most important thing you could do. It’s staggering when you think about it.
Vegetarianism takes care of so many things in one shot: ecology, famine, cruelty.”
--Sir Paul McCartney

Check out heaps of information on Vegetarianism, Prasadam-ism,
download books, Vegetarian Recipe programs, and more.

A Beginners Guide to Vegetarianism:
How Mary and Frank and Friends Eat - very nice Vegetarian pages:
Vegetarian recipes:

Heaps of Quick Vegetarian Recipies:

101 Reasons Why I'm a Vegetarian:

Healthy Indian Vegetarian Cooking Recipes:


"You Mean That's in the Bible" - expose on meat eating:
- oxymoron of the yuga:
Protect both our species, two-legged and four-legged. Both food and water for their needs supply.
May they with us increase in stature and strength. Save us from hurt all our days, O Powers!

Rig Veda Samhita 10.37.11.

Download one of Bhakti Rasa prabhu's songs for FREE
"Don't Eat Your Friends" (It Ain't Nice)

and visit Bhakti Rasa prabhu's site:

Check out Kurma prabhu's new web-site:

XMAS Recipes @
We wish you a Vege Xmas

McDeath - the facts about Ronnie McDonalds:

Meet your Meat FREE CDRoms
This is a must for those who live in the illusion of animal killing is somehow acceptable or humane.

I have converted the "Meet your Meat" video into a CD rom & will send a copy of it for free to anyone with a Cd burner & a pledge to make at least 4 copies to give to their meat eating friends.

This is the new version
I sent out a total of over 750 CD's last year to 60 different countries. My goal in 2003 is to double that number.
I would appreciate if you would forward this message to your readers.
Anyone willing to participate, please forward my mailing address as


Vegetarians BEWARE of Orange Softdrinks
Coca-Cola (manufacturer) - Not suitable for vegetarians; lists the following products as not vegetarian
These products contain traces of fish gelatine, which are used as a stabiliser for beta-carotene colour.

Fanta Orange
Diet Fanta Orange
Lilt Pineapple & Grapefruit
Diet Lilt Pineapple & Grapefruit

Soft Drinks - Some canned Orange drinks use gelatine as a carrier for added Beta Caratine.
(This would not appear on the ingredients panel).
(Text PAMHO:5891790) ---------------------------------------

According to recent communications with Chelsea Sugar group - NZ Sugars their Sugars are now free from "Bone Char" bleaching process and so devotees can again use and offer White Sugar safely.

See more details HERE

As of last week in November 2003 Yopliat the yogurt people now put geletine in their products
See here for pointers of okay ones

 Krishna Conscious - Vedikly acceptable Jokes

Healing with humour: Taking better care of ourselves  =>:-))

This is a MUST READ

Four Wives parable:

Two westernized Indian families were talking, Jasprit (Jack) and Tirupaty (Tracy):

"How was your game, dear?"  asked Jack's wife Tracy.
"Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight's gotten so bad I couldn't see where the ball went," he answered.
"But you're 75 years old, Jack!" admonished his wife "what can you expect?",
"Why don't you take my brother Sanjay along?"
"But he's 85 and doesn't play golf anymore," protested Jack.
"But he's got perfect eyesight. He would watch the ball for you," Tracy pointed out.
The next day Jack teed off with Sanjay looking on. Jack swung and the ball disappeared down the middle of the fairway.
"Do you see it?" asked Jack.
"Yup," Sanjay answered.
"Well, where is it?" yelled Jack, peering off into the distance.
Sanjay replied "Dunno, I forgot already."

Mukunda from Luidiana in the Punjab was actually a very tolerant landlord.
But Kalachandji, the artist, had not paid his rent in five months.  Enough is enough, thought Mukunda.

"I am sorry Kalachandji,"demanded Mukunda.  "Either you pay up or get out!"

"You don't realize what you are doing," pleaded Kalachandji.
"One day people will pass this miserable little apartment and say, 'Kalachandji, the artist, lived here.'"

"I got news for you, Kalachandji," responded Mukunda.  "I f you don't pay me by tonight, they'll be saying that tomorrow."

While proudly showing off his new fraternity house to friends, a college student led the way into the den.

"What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked.

"That's the talking clock", the man replied, with a grin. "Let me show you how it works!"

And with that, he gave the gong an ear-shattering pound with the hammer.

Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall,

A group of "blonde burglars" were robbing a bank. One of them pointed a gun at a teller's head and shouted:
"Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!"

The cashier laughed and said, "You mean H I S T O R Y!"

The burglar shouted back, "Don't change the subject."

A young Jewish mother is preparing something to eat one Friday for Shabbat dinner. Her daughter watches with interest as the mother slices off the ends of the roast vegetable casserole before placing it in the roasting pan.

The young girl asks her mother why she did this. The mother pauses for a moment and then says, "You know, I'm not sure. This is the way I always saw my mother make it once, and she did it. Let's call Bubie and ask her." So, she phones her mother and asks why they always slice the ends off the preparation before roasting it.

The Bubie thinks for a moment and then says, "You know, I'm not sure why, this is the way I always saw MY mother make a it. Now the three women are very curious, so they pay a visit to the great-bubie in the nursing home.

"You know when we cook in the oven a roast vegetable casserole," they explain, "we always slice off the ends before roasting. Why is that?"

"I don't know why YOU do it" said the old woman, "but I never had a pan that was large enough!"

Yogi Berra was famed for his verbal bloopers. After a streaker took to the field during a game one day, Berra was asked about the perpetrator's gender. "I don't know," he replied. "Their face was covered by a bag."
Yogi Berra was once taken to a famous restaurant at which he had never before dined. "No wonder nobody comes here," he declared, gazing around the crowded eatery. "It's too crowded."
While ordering a pizza one day, Yogi Berra was asked whether he would like it cut into four or eight slices. "Better make it four," he replied. "I don't think I can eat eight."

Yogi Berra was once informed that a Jew had been elected Lord Mayor of Dublin. His reply? "Only in America!"

One hot summer day, Yogi Berra was approached by an admiring fan. "Good afternoon, Mr. Berra," she said. "You look mighty cool today." "Thank you, ma'am," Yogi replied. "You don't look so hot yourself!"

Yogi Berra was famed for his nonsensical logic. "I knew I was going to take the wrong train," he remarked one day, "so I left early."

Thanks Shyam'

The editor of a small country Newspaper, furious over several government
bills that had recently been passed, printed a scathing editorial with
an enormous headline "HALF THE LEGISLATORS ARE CROOKS"'.

Many local Politicians were outraged and exerted tremendous pressure on
him to print a retraction. He finally gave in to the pressure and ran
his apology with the headline "HALF THE LEGISLATORS ARE NOT CROOKS".

Did you ever wonder?

Shortly before takeoff one day, a flight attendant approached Muhammad Ali and politely asked him to fasten his seat belt. Ali, never noted for his modesty, refused: "Superman," he explained, "don't need no seat belt." "Well, Superman," the stewardess smartly replied, "don't need no airplane!"

[Ali fastened his seat belt.]

High school students history answers: -

* Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics.
They lived in the Sarah Dessert. The climate of the Sarah is such
that all the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.

* Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea where they made unleavened
bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount
Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.

* The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't
have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth .

* Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice.
They killed him. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.

* Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ides
of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king.
Dying, he gasped out: "Tee hee, Brutus."

* Joan of Arc, the wife of Noah was burnt to a steak and was canonized  by Bernard Shaw.

* Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success.
When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted,"hurrah."

* It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented
removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the
circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he
invented cigarettes and started smoking.

* The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was
born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. Writing at the same time
as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great
author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and
he wrote Paradise Regained.

* Delegates from the original 13 states formed the Contented Congress.
Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the
Declaration of Independence. Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.

* Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died
in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own
hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves by signing the Emasculation
Proclamation. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater
and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. They
believe the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposingly insane actor.
This ruined Booth's career.

* Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number
of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in
his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous
composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half
Italian, and half English. He was very large.

* Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote
loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling
for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.

thanx Shyam'

There is a merger in the works involving Polygraph Records, Warner
Brothers, and Keebler. It will be called ... Poly-Warner-Cracker.

The ways of this material world - strange but true

Church clippings II

These are clippings from church newspapers. It's amazing what a little
proofreading could have done.

-> The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment,
and gracious hostility.

-> Potluck supper Sunday at 500 P.M.-prayer and medication to follow.

-> The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They
may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

-> This evening at 7 P.M. there will be a hymn sing in the park across
from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

-> Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies
are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

-> The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation
would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next
Sunday morning.

-> Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use
the back door.

-> The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the
Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The Congregation is invited to attend
this tragedy.

-> Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.

-> Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.

-> The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign
slogan last Sunday  "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."

from Mark

A defense attorney was cross-examining a Chicago police officer during a felony trial -- it went like this:

Q. Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
A. No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender running several blocks away.

Q. Officer, who provided this description?
A. The officer who responded to the scene.

Q. A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?
A. Yes sir, with my life.

Q. With your life? Let me ask you this then officer -- do you have a locker room in the police station -- a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?
A. Yes sir, we do.

Q. And do you have a locker in that room?
A. Yes sir, I do.

Q. And do you have a lock on your locker?
A. Yes sir.

Q. Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with those same officers?
A. You see sir, we share the building with a court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.

With that, the courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called.

sent in by Shyam'

Picasso once fell into conversation with an American GI who professed to dislike modern paintings because they were not realistic. The artist said nothing and the conversation moved on to such other subjects as the GI's girlfriend - a snapshot of whom he passed over to Picasso. "My!" the artist exclaimed, examining the picture. "Is she really that small?"

Not surprisingly, the production of forged Picassos grew apace with the artist's acclaim. One needy artist, having acquired a supposed Picasso, had a friend show it to Picasso for authentication so that he could sell it. "A fake," Picasso declared. Soon thereafter, the friend acquired two more alleged Picassos. When Picasso declared both to be forgeries, the man was incredulous. "I saw you paint this last one with my own eyes!" he cried. Picasso's reply? "I can paint fake Picassos as well as anyone!"

Picasso once visited a local cabinet-maker to commission a mahogany wardrobe for his chateau in the South of France. To illustrate the design, he quickly drew a sketch showing its shape and dimensions, handing it to the craftsman. "How much will it cost?" Picasso asked. "Nothing," the cabinet-maker replied. "Just sign the sketch."

Many visitors to Picasso's home in the south of France were astonished to find that its walls boasted none of his own works. "Why is that, Pablo?" someone once asked. "Don't you like them?" "On the contrary - I like them very much," the painter replied. "It's just that I can't afford them."

One day during World War II, Pablo Picasso was visited by the German Gestapo in his apartment in Nazi-occupied Paris. One of his unwelcome visitors, having noticed a picture of Guernica (his depiction of the destruction of the Basque capital by German planes during the Spanish Civil War) on a table, asked, "Did you do that?" "No," Picasso replied. "You did."

Thanx again Shyam'

A man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of
Heaven and said, "Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you -- we've
looked at your life, and your really didn't do anything particularly good or
bad. We're not at all sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you
did that can help us make a decision?"

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, "Yeah, once I was
driving along and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of
bikers. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of
the bikers. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his body
and a ring pierced through his nose. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his
nose, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or
would have to deal with me!"

"I'm impressed," St. Peter responded, "When did this happen?"

"About two minutes ago," replies the guy.


You might like to check out Krishna-conscious jokes -
Also check out the Humour section of the Main Index:


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