Healing with humour: Taking better care of ourselves  =>;-))
http://www.hknet.org.nz/healthNhumour.html
Visit our Hasya Rasa pages

Laughter Therapy - its no joke:
http://www.healthlibrary.com/reading/yod/march98/news.htm

        So Lord Caitanya is known as the one:

 - hasya-kari  &  hasya-yuk  ==> who laughs & jokes

 - hasya-priya  ==> who is fond of joking

 - hasya-nagara ==> who is the hero of those expert in speaking joking words

 - hasya-grami  &  hasya-kara  ==> is expert at joking

 - pushpa-hasa  ==> whose smile & laugh are as charminng as flowers.

Lord Gauranga's smiling & laughing qualities ki...

                                                ys Radhe Govinda dasa

P.S. One of the qualities of Srimati Radharani is that she is very expert in the art of joking.

SOME FACTS ABOUT HUMOUR

"With devotion steeped in love and affection, the yogi should meditate within the core of his heart upon the laughter of Lord Vishnu. The laughter of Vishnu is so captivating that it can be easily meditated upon. When the Supreme Lord is laughing, one can see His small teeth, which resemble jasmine buds rendered rosy by the splendor of His lips. Once devoting his mind to this, the yogi no longer desires to see anything else." ~ S.P., Srimad-Bhagavatam 3-23-33 "Kapila's Instructions on Devotional Service"

SCIENCE - After surgery but prior to the administration of pain medication, patients were told one-liner jokes. Those patients who were exposed to the humor experienced less pain in comparison to the other surgery patients who didn't get a dose of humor as part of their therapy. ~ Summary from study published in  ' Journal of Holistic Nursing'

Medical experts (Dr. Derk & Dr. Wiilliiamsburg) reveal that a powerful laugh will relax tensed muscles, brings more oxygen into the system and more quickly, lowers blood pressure, and offers a free, overall health benefits on many levels! And its free!. (If the FDA could manufacture a medicine like this, they'd charge a bundle.)

Loma Linda University Cali study by Dr. Lee Berk and Dr. Stanley Tan showed that physiological responses that were produced from belly laughter, were the opposite of what is seen in classical stress, thereby offering yet more evidence that laughing produces healthy or positive emotions.

Results of research by Dr. Lee Berk and Dr. Stanley Tan (Loma Linda U of Ca) indicated that after a good belly laugh, there is a general increase in activity within the immune system, such as: increased number and activity level of natural killer cells that attack viral infected cells and some types of cancer and tumor cells.

If it tickles your funny bone then chances are it will reduce the stress in your life and leave your immune system to do its part. This premise has been supported by both the field of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences. A recent publication with research data appeared in the Journal of the American Medical Association. Skin welt sizes were compared in patients suffering from severe allergies after one group watched a video featuring Charlie Chaplin and the other group listened to a documentary on weather. Needless to say, the Japanese study confirmed a reduction in skin welt size in the group watching the famed comedian. [FROM CNN.COM]  CHICAGO, ILLINOIS, February 13, 2001:

MORE SCIENTIFIC FINDINGS ABOUT LAUGHTER

* Laughter stimulates physical healing.
* Laughter enhances our individual creativity.
* Laughter is rejuvenating and regenerating.
* Laughter is good for relationships (that includes friendships).
* Laughter opens the heart.
* Laughter gives us a glimpse of freedom from the mind. (In other words, helpful for getting off the mental platform!)

~~ Articles by N. Lehrman in Archives of Internal Medicine, April 26,1993; Lee Berk, Dr. P.H. in Loma Linda University School of Medicine News, March 11,1999; N.Silver in American Health, November 1986; J. McCormick in Lancet, August 1994.

"We are less likely to succcummb to feelings of depression and helplessness if we are able to laugh at what is troubling us. Humor gives us a sense of perspective on our problems. Laughter provides an opportunity for the release of those uncomfortable emotions which, if held inside, may create biochemical changes that are harmful to the body." Patty Wooten, author of 'Pulmonary Rehabilitation: Guidelines to Success'

SCIENTIFIC FINDINGS - Controlled studies have given evidence that a good belly laugh has lowered serum cortisol levels, increased amounts of activated T lymphocytes, increased number and activity of natural killer cells, and increased the number of T cells that have helper/ suppresser receptors. Or to sum it up: laughter off-sets the immunosuppressive effects of stress and is therefore significantly improves the health of the immune system. - Discoveries by Dr. Berk and Dr. Tan, Loma Linda University.

Evidence (from EEG) revealed that when a joke is just about to be told, the initial anticipation results in  the brains cortex's left hemisphere starting the function of analyzing of word processing. Next, most brain activity moved to the frontal lobe (the center of emotions). After that, the right hemisphere's synthesis mix with the left's processing to look for and locate the pattern or to be able to "get" the joke. Very quickly following, though just prior to the persons had quite enough time to laugh, brain waves increase and spread to   the occipital lobe which is the sensory processing areas of the brain. There was an increase in fluctuations of delta waves which reached a crescendo of activity and crested as the brain 'got' the joke followed by the recipient beginning of laughter. So here you have 'scientific' knowledge how laughter works, integrating the brain and getting it to all function together, thanks to Dr. Derk & Dr. Williamsburg. Now, stop analyzing and start laughing! :-) You have facts that it's actually beneficial for a variety of health issues, so don't minimize its importance and start giving yourself permission to take out time each day to laugh.  Like a vitamin or even a meal, it's a necessity!

Courtesy of mother Pritaa ACBSP's site http://www.geocities.com/priitaa108/humor.htm

Laugh Yoga with Bir Krishna Goswami

Laugh Yoga during a picnic in Helsinki
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2932828682381191751

Laugh Yoga with Master Laugh Therapist BK Goswami - Laugh Yoga at It's Best In Split Croatia - 1 hr 41 min 49 sec - Aug 30, 2007
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5224249030279265816

This is a MUST READ =>;-Q
http://www.digitalsawdust.com

Four Wives parable:
http://www.hknet.org.nz/4wives.pps

 Click on this link to see how really short life is.
http://www.sastradana.com/video/lifeisshort.wmv

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

Angry mouths flip out at a Press Conference
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym9hMtpk9d4

12 days of Xmas Indian style
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owK5tHjL0aE

nah come on I'm serious.......show me a sign !!!

A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth.  He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time  ago, that He grew up, etc.
So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today ?"

Johnny raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."

Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."

Robert, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know!  He's in our bathroom!!!"

The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response.
The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Robert how he knew this.

 Robert said, "Well.....every morning my father gets up, bangs  on the bathroom door, and yells, 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?'!"

How a good wife ballances the family

Doctor Ravindra Thakur, who was known for miraculous cures for arthritis, had a waiting room full of people when a little old lady,
completely bent over in half, shuffled in slowly, leaning on her cane.

When her turn came, she went into the doctor's office, and, amazingly, emerged within 5 minutes walking completely erect with her head held high.

A woman in the waiting room who had seen all this walked up to the little old lady and said, "It's a miracle!
You walked in bent in half and now you're walking erect. What did that doctor do?"

"Gave me a longer cane."

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher
said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because
even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it
was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

.......in brief !!!!

.............for the conspirital theorists among you

One summer my sis and I stayed with an uncle who lived on a farm way up north in some place called,
Wisconsin, that seemed much more than the miles, removed from our big city Chicago neighborhood.

I remember he wrote, to one of the giant mail order companies, either Sears & Roebuck, (don't ya wonder whatever happened to Mr. Roebuck, seems he disappeared very suspiciously without a trace) or "Monkey" Montgomery Wards, whose mail order businesses were the lifeline for everything from women's dresses to tractors and even complete houses to the people out in the rural hinterlands of our growing country.

That's right, wrote, corresponded, with pen and paper, before computers and when the country party line rural telephone companies were used mainly for local communication and gossip and long distance was considered expensive and for notifying relatives of major events like death, divorce or pestilence,

He asked for the price of a carton of their toilet paper. After a few weeks, the company wrote back and told him to look on page number 287.

I recall that my taciturn uncle, wrote another letter back stating that; "If I had your catalog, I wouldn't need your toilet paper."

I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier
than the people who have to wait for them.

A young man volunteered to baby-sit one night so his mom could have an evening out.
At bedtime he sent the youngsters upstairs to bed and settled down to watch some football.

One child kept creeping down the stairs, but the young man kept sending him back.

At 9:00 p.m., the doorbell rang. It was the next-door neighbour, Mrs. Jasminder Kaur, asking whether her son was there.
The young man brusquely replied, "No."

Just then a little head appeared over the banister and a voice shouted, "I'm here, Mom, but he won't let me go home."

After the visiting preacher finished, a woman came up and said, "You
were much better than the preacher we had last Sunday. He spoke for an hour and said nothing."

"Thank you," the visiting preacher replied.

"Yes," she continued. "You did it in fifteen minutes."

........well the life raft slide works, even if the buttons on the arm rest are wrongly connected

  Did you ever wonder? 

A newscaster interrupted scheduled programming. "More on candidates at 10 P.M.," he said.

The ten-year-old boy looked at his father in disbelief and said,
"I didn't know they could call politicians 'morons' on national television!"

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

Vaastu nightmare

HELL

An Indian dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country.

He goes first to the German hell and asks, "What do they do here?"

He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then
they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil
comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He
checks out the American hell as well as the Russian hell and many more.
He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Indian hell and finds that there is a very long line
of people waiting to get in.

Amazed, he asks, "What do they do here?"

He is told, "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then
they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil
comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells. Why are there so many people waiting to get in?"

"Because the maintanence is so bad that the electric chair does not work,
someone has stolen all the nails from the bed, and the devil is a former
Gov't servant, so he comes in, signs the register, and then goes to the cafeteria . . ."

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

How alcohol makes one a little "off track"

In Las Vegas a guy walks up to a coke machine where he sees a shapely blonde ahead of him. as he waits, she puts in a dollar and takes out a coke,
puts in a dollar and takes out another coke, puts in another dollar and takes out another coke...after about ten cokes, the guy, understandably frustrated says, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING????"

the blonde sexily and slowly swings round, glances him slowly up and down, and finally, responds....in a slow so cal valley drawl..."duh....winning?"

Thanks to Hrishikeshananda prabhu ACBSP - Thailand

Is it common for people my age to have problems with short term memory storage?
Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem.

Texan - limo

The ways of this material world - strange but true
 

I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.
Got directed to a call center in Pakistan.
I told them I was suicidal.
They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse.
The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing the sick-leave provisions set out by their contract.

One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper,
"This man," he announced, "called in sick yesterday!"

There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.

A union negotiator broke the silence in the room.

"Wow!" he said. "Just think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he
saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he
got out to investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.
"We don't have any money for food." the poor man replied.
"Oh, come along with me then."
"But sir, I have a wife with two children!"
"Bring them along! And you, come with us too!", he said to the other man.
"But sir, I have a wife with six children!" the second man answered.
"Bring them as well!"

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large
as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says, "Sir, you are too
kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is about two feet tall!"

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war.
  After his talk he offers question time.
  One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Billy"

  "And what is your question, Billy?"

  "I have 3 questions.

  First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

  Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes?

  And third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?"

  Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies
  that they will continue after recess.

  When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh that's right
  question time. Who has a question?"

  Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks
  him what his name is.

  "Steve"

 "And what is your question, Steve?"

  "I have 5 questions.

  First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

  Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes?

  Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?

  Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?

  And fifth, what happened to Billy?"

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

A cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP Laser Jet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

“You're a Congressman for the U. S. Government", says the cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows... this is a herd of sheep.

Now give me back my dog.

We live in an age when unnecessary things
are our only necessities.

Oscar Wilde

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

.......more optical illusions and paradigm twists here:

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

Why did the students flunk the final exam at the Magician's School?

They were all trick questions.

A Blonde's First American  Football Game

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first American football game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game,  all they kept screaming was 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'

"I'm like ....... Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!"

A blonde guy goes to the big football game, he has great seats on the 50 yard line, 8 rows up, perfect.
 
Just before kickoff he hears someone behind him yelling,
 
"Arnold, we're up here, Arnold!"
 
He turns around and misses the kickoff! A short while later, just as the quarterback throws a long bomb, the same guy starts yelling,
 
"Hey Arnold, we're up here, Arnold!!"
 
Again he turns around and again he misses the play
 
This goes on for every big play. He hears the guy shouting,
 
"Hey Arnold, look up here!" He turns around and misses the play.
 
Finally, fuming mad, he turns around, pulls out his binoculars and scans the crowd for the guy doing all the yelling. He eventually spots him, after missing yet another big play. He runs up the stands, nearly to the top of the stadium. Pulls the guy out into the aisle, picks him up by the lapels and shouts,
 
"Shut-up, my name isn't Arnold!!"

Sadarji Mansingh found the following ransom note slipped under his front door.
"Bring $50,000 to the 17th hole of your country club tomorrow at 10:00 AM if you ever want to see your wife alive again."

But it was well after 1:00 PM by the time he arrived at the designated meeting spot.

A masked man stepped from behind a bush and demanded, "You're three hours late. What took you so long?"

"Give me a break baba!" said Mansingh, pointing to his scorecard.  "I'm a 27 handicap"

Please Try our little Colour Test - Right Brain vs Left Brain:
http://www.njagyouth.org/colortest.swf

I can't believe you actually clicked on that