Healing with humour: Taking better care of ourselves  =>;-))
http://www.hknet.org.nz/healthNhumour.html
Visit our Hasya Rasa pages

Laughter Therapy - its no joke:
http://www.healthlibrary.com/reading/yod/march98/news.htm

        So Lord Caitanya is known as the one:

 - hasya-kari  &  hasya-yuk  ==> who laughs & jokes

 - hasya-priya  ==> who is fond of joking

 - hasya-nagara ==> who is the hero of those expert in speaking joking words

 - hasya-grami  &  hasya-kara  ==> is expert at joking

 - pushpa-hasa  ==> whose smile & laugh are as charminng as flowers.

Lord Gauranga's smiling & laughing qualities ki...

                                                ys Radhe Govinda dasa

P.S. One of the qualities of Srimati Radharani is that she is very expert in the art of joking.

This is a MUST READ =>;-Q
http://www.digitalsawdust.com

Four Wives parable:
http://www.hknet.org.nz/4wives.pps

 Click on this link to see how really short life is.
http://www.sastradana.com/video/lifeisshort.wmv

sent in by Shyamasundar prabhu ACBSP

Xmas trivia

January, like February, was introduced into the Roman calendar by a legendary king of Rome, Numa Pompilius (c. 715 - 673 BCE), who named it in honour of Janus, the god of doors and openings (Latin janus, a door).
Janus is represented in Roman art as a man with two faces, one looking backwards and one forwards, implying that he stood between the old and the new year, holding both in regard.
The ancient Jewish New Year, which began on March 25, continued for a long time to have a legal standing in Christian countries. In England, it was not until 1752 that in legal, as in popular circles, January 1 became New Year ...

Read on at the Book of Days http://www.wilsonsalmanac.com/bookofdays.html

New Year’s Day is a holiday in 162 nations of the world. In Britain there is an old custom that you should take nothing out of the house today, not even garbage.

Take out, then take in
Bad luck will begin
Take in, then take out
Good luck comes about

If you must carry something out, make sure to bring something in first. The best thing is a coin which you have hidden outside on New Year’s Eve.
An old British tradition has it that you should not lend matches, or fuel, to anyone today, or you’ll lack fire all year. And don’t lend money to anyone, or you’ll be without it this year ...

Read on at the Book of Days http://www.wilsonsalmanac.com/bookofdays.html

Read more about Xmas Madness HERE

Hare Krishna Prabhujis and Matajis,

Please accept my humble pranams. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and Gurudeva.

Plans! We make so many of them just to please our materials needs, but never do we think on the fact that Krishna is the supreme planner as well as supreme sanctioner too. Until Krishna plans and sanctions nothing can happen; not even a blade of grass can move without His glance.

If we want to make Krishna laugh, we can do it by going in front of Him with a list of our unlimited desires in the form of plans. We forget the reality that nothing can be permanent within this material world and death may grab us at any moment. I am writing this mail now, but only Krishna knows what my tomorrow holds for me. The laws of nature does not allow a "second" beyond what one is destined to enjoy.

Whenever there are reverses in life, our beloved Gurudev always quotes this verse, from Srimad Bhagavatam 1.9.16:

na hy asya karhicid raajan / pumaan veda vidhitsitam
yad vijijnaasayaa yuktaa / muhyanti kavayo ’pi hi

"O King, no one can know the plan of the Lord [Shri Krishna]. Even though great philosophers inquire exhaustively, they are bewildered."

Srimad Bhagavatam 4.24.66, reveals the truth behind the reason for our plans, and how it is smashed by the Lord in the form of eternal time.

pramattam uccair iti krtya-cintayaa
pravrddha-lobham vishayeshu laalasam
tvam apramattah sahasaabhipadyase
ksul-lelihaano ’hir ivaakhum antakah

"My dear Lord, all living entities within this material world are mad after planning for things, and they are always busy with a desire to do this or that. This is due to uncontrollable greed. The greed for material enjoyment is always existing in the living entity, but Your Lordship is always alert, and in due course of time You strike him, just as a snake seizes a mouse and very easily swallows him."

In the purport to the above verse Srila Prabhupada declares that the real reason behind all this plan making is our unlimited greed for material enjoyment.

Our plans for life are never finished, and we go on preparing plan after plan, all of which are never finished. When the final notice of death is there, there is no consideration of the man’s desire. Our desires cannot be satisfied by illusory thoughts and plans. As the shastras reveal, the best policy is simply to abide by the orders of the Lord without argument.

The maker of Titanic claimed that this ship won't sink, but in its maiden voyage itself it sank and nothing was left. Time grabs everybody and nobody is left behind.

As said by Srila Prabhupada, there’s a song which states, “I constructed this home for happiness, but unfortunately there was a fire, and everything has now been burnt to ashes.” All of one’s plans are annihilated in due course of time. All of us repeatedly make plans, which are all repeatedly frustrated. Therefore one should stop such plan-making.

Hence, I pray unto the lotus feet of Sri Krishna, Srila Prabhupada and Srila Gurudev, so as to always engage me in their service,
always think and plan as to how to serve them.

Thank you very much,
Yours in the service of Srila Prabhupada and Gurudev,
Nayana Priya Devi Dasi
Abu dhabi.

Humorous

One who has got knowledge is humorous also. (Conversation, 20 May 1975)

A gentleman should be humorous. (Letter, 26 September 1975)

Srila Prabhupada was simultaneously grave and joyful, serious and jolly. He had a good sense of humor and often laughed, joked, or told comical stories. But although funny, Prabhupada was never frivolous. Even his lighter mood was fully Krsna conscious. He did not laugh, joke, or perform antics for cheap popularity or just to pass the time of day. He had a transcendental purpose in everything he did. Unlike the joking of mundane comedians, Prabhupada's wit did not leave us feeling empty. Rather, it helped us on the path of fulfillment, because he gave Krsna consciousness along with the laughs.

- From the "Jaya Srila Prabhupada!" by HH Bhakti Vikasa Swami


hahaha I've told this one a few Xmas's, but still funny - JTCd

108% TRUE

.....needless to say shastra saved the day again, and the devotee went on to distribute many of Srila Prabhupada's books

Told to me by Brighupati dasa ACBSP in 1993, who was there at the time.

The Truth about Santa Claus

The Truth about Santa Claus - big beard + big belly +  terrible suit = Indian.....
http://youtube.com/watch?v=EgLYqen37Q8&search=Hindu%20humour

March of the Nazi Santas
From a German newspaper

Who is behind brigades of Santa Clauses giving the Sieg Heil! Nazi salute? Der Spiegel investigates:

Christmas shoppers in Germany are horrified. Across the country, models of Santa Claus in shop windows appear to be giving the Nazi salute.
Some chains have already removed them from the shelves.

The company responsible for the Fuehrer-saluting St. Nicks is unrepentant:
The toymaker behind the Nazi Santas is unimpressed with the unwanted attention their product is receiving.
"We are surprised that a Santa pointing skyward has been associated with the Hitler salute," he told Bild.

What happens when paranoic "political correctness" gets out of control

It was Xmas day and all the family, as well as the local priest came to see the young man dying in the hospital bed, as the family gathered around him suddenly the dying man began to flail about and make motions as if he would like to speak.

The priest, who was keeping watch at the side of his bed, leaned quietly over  and asked, "Do you have something you would like to say?" The man nodded to the affirmatively.  The priest handed him a pad and pen. "I know you can't speak, but use this to write a note and I will give it to your wife. She's waiting just outside."

Gathering his last bit of strength, the man took them and scrawled his message upon the pad.  He stuffed into the priests hands and, moments later, the man died. After administering the last rites, the priest left to break the sad news to the wife.

After consoling the widow, the priest handed her the note.

"Here were his last words. Just before passing on, he wrote this message to you."
The wife tearfully opened the note, which read, "YOU'RE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN HOSE!!"

When Christmas shopping goes wrong... Careful out there shoppers!

A cowboy went to an insurance agency to buy a policy. The agent asked, "Have you ever had an accident?"

"Nope," replied the cowboy. "Last summer, a bronco kicked in two of my ribs, and a couple of years ago, a rattlesnake bit me on the ankle."

"Wouldn't you call those accidents?" quizzed the puzzled agent.

"Naw," the cowboy replied. "They did it on purpose!"

get the message kid???

Nobody talks so consistently about God as those who insist that there is no God.

Did you ever wonder?

Stats'

If you consider that there has been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theatre of operations during the last 22 months,
and a total of 2,112 deaths, that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 10,000 soldiers.

The firearm death rate in Washington D.C. is 80.6 per 10,000 for the same period.

That means that you are about 25% more likely to be shot and killed in the U.S. Capitol,
which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation, than you are in Iraq.

Conclusion: The U.S. should pull out of Washington immediately.

"Wow! That's a big bird you've got this year..."

I guess that's what they mean by sharing a festival with friends eh

One devotee speaking to another: How was your Christmas with the relations...????
It was great we had grandma for Christmas dinner  ?

The other devotee replied, O really, we had tofurkey, baked veggies and Xmas cake !



Fore...

A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course.
One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course.
He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.

His friend says: "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man."

The man then replies: "Yeah, well we were married 35 years."

Sounds like a ringing endorsement...

Xmas presents:

Still shopping for the that " hard to buy for" person? How about this? Space burials.

Celestis Inc. is planning an April send-off in Russia for as
many as 150 ash-filled capsules as part of the cargo on a Kosmos satellite.

The containers will share space with data transmission
equipment and will orbit the Earth for as long as 156 years.
Costs ranges from $995 to $5,300, depending on the capsule size.

Surprise your child this year with a Special Delivery Package
from Santa.

This personalized holiday package includes: a personalized
letter, good list sticker and certificate, autographed picture
and an after Christmas postcard  all from sent from Santa!
Order today and get a gift card!

http://ab.vcmedia.com/c/s=29539/c=105494/

hahaha what next eh

At the company water cooler, a colleague bragged about her children's world travels: one son was teaching in Bolivia, another was working in southern Italy,
and her daughter was completing a yearlong research project in India.

One co-worker's quip, however, stopped me short. "What is it about you," he asked, ".....that makes your kids want to get so far away?"

The ways of this material world - strange but true

Final in the football results:

 Mayavadis-all  1    -    Sadhu Wanderers 3

........notice the lotus footwork !

A Jewish man  was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached the newspaper reader: "Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?"

Moshe replied: "I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find?  Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty. So I switched to the Arab newspaper.  Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better... "

PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

.......more optical illusions and paradigm twists here:

Our children may be falling behind in mathematics, but there's no shortage of good ol'  ingenuity!

Helisoft

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment.

Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."

The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it.

"I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

PYRRHONISM, n. An ancient philosophy, named for its inventor. It consisted of an absolute disbelief in everything but Pyrrhonism.
Its modern professors have added that.

Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
http://www.online-literature.com/bierce/devilsdictionary/

Just following instructions

An Irishman went to see the doctor with a hole in his earlobe and blisters all over his feet.

The doctor asked, "What happened, Paddy?"

Paddy replied, "I was opening a Christmas pudding, and on the packet it said: 'pierce ere and stand in boiling water'."

from Patricia

A man was on a walking holiday in Ireland. He became thirsty so decided to ask at a home for something to drink.
The lady of the house invited him in and served him a bowl of soup by the fire.

There was a wee pig running around the kitchen, running up to the visitor and giving him a great deal of attention.
The visitor commented that he had never seen a pig this friendly.

The housewife replied: "Ah, he's not that friendly. That's his bowl you're using."

.................yes, there's at least one in EVERY crowd 

An olde couple went into Gopal's Vegetarian Restaurante one day. He ordered one vegeburger, one order of  french fries and one drink.

The old man unwrapped the vegeburger and carefully cut it in half. He placed one half  in front of his wife. He then carefully  counted out the french fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them.

As he began to eat his few bites of vegeburger, the people around them kept looking over and whispering.

You could tell they were thinking,  "That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them."

As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table. He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple.
The old man said they were just fine - They were used to sharing everything.

The surrounding people noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.

Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them.
This time the old woman said "No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything."

As the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin,
the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked "What is it you are waiting for?"

She answered....

"THE TEETH."

Is this what they mean "while supplies last" with Xmas tree???

Oh the Scientific Genius of it !!!:

One of the world's greatest scientists was also recognized as the original absent-minded professor.
One day, on board a train, he was unable to find his ticket. The conductor said, "Take it easy. You'll find it."

When the conductor returned, the professor still couldn't find the ticket.
The conductor, recognizing the famous scientist, said, "I'm sure you bought a ticket. Forget about it."

"You're very kind," the professor said, "but I must find it, otherwise I won't know where to get off."

Please Try our little Colour Test - Right Brain vs Left Brain:
http://www.njagyouth.org/colortest.swf
 

I can't believe you actually did that !!!!!!

now click BACK to go back